Archive for the ‘writing’ Category

How to Bootlick – Story of Rum “Bum” and Bootlicking

July 21, 2017

During my Navy Days – whenever I reported to a new ship or establishment for duty – most bosses would give me the quintessential Navy Sermon – a “moral lecture” on hard-work and sincerity – devotion to duty – “Service Before Self” – Chetwode Credo – etc etc etc.

Then – they would explain my job to me – and – a few would ask if there was anything they could do for me.

But – I came across a crazy boss whose first words to me were:

“I want your liquor card…”

Read on…

RUM BUM and BOOTLICKING

Unforgettable Memories of my Wonderful Navy Days

A Fictional Spoof By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/humor-in-uniform-i-want-your-liquor-card.html

MILITARY PERKS

In the colonial days of the British Raj – a number of privileges, benefits and concessions were granted to the military.

After independence – most of these military privileges and benefits continued – but over the years – these exclusive military privileges have been extended to civilians as well.

Take the example of CSD Canteens – which provide concessional goods to military personnel and veterans.

When conceived – the CSD Facility was exclusively meant for military personnel.

Slowly – over the years – this CSD facility has been extended to all Civilian Employees working in various defence ministry offices and departments and public sector undertakings – though these civilian employees have a comfortable secure life without the hardships and regimentation suffered by the soldier.

Now – these civilian employees will enjoy CSD facilities even after retirement.

Civilian Employees are able to obtain maximum benefit because they have unions and associations who fight for their rights and do collective bargaining.

Sadly – soldiers are not allowed to form unions/associations – and hence – they have no one to fight for their rights – so they lose out vis-à-vis their civilian counterparts.

Coming back to CSD Canteens – only one military concession has not yet been extended to civilians – the CSD Liquor Quota.

Yes – CSD Liquor Quota” remains the “last bastion of military privileges.

However – though civilians are not entitled CSD Liquor Quota (de jure) – the ground reality is that most civilians enjoy this liquor privilege – de facto

Here is a hilarious “memoir” from my wonderful navy days that illustrates my point…

Rum “Bum” and Boot-Licking : A Fictional Spoof by Vikram Karve

RUM

The catchphrase “Rum Bum Lash Navy” is no longer relevant – in fact, this is a thing of the distant past.

“Bum” was outlawed centuries ago.

In due course the “Lash” was also abolished.

Even “Rum” was abolished in the Royal Navy on 31 July 1970 – the memorable last day when Rum Rations were served to sailors – and this day was observed as “Black Tot Day”.

Thankfully – the only saving grace is the Duty-Free Liquor you get on Navy Ships – and concessional “Fauji” Liquor you get ashore in CSD canteens.

Of course – unlike in the “Royal Navy” of yesteryear – when sailors were issued rum rations free of cost as a part of their perks – nowadays – you have to pay from your own pocket for your booze – and worse – you get a limited “Quota” of this “Fauji” CSD Liquor – depending on your rank – the higher your rank – the more booze you can drink (an incentive for promotion).

And – for availing of this “Fauji” Liquor Quota – you have to get a CSD Liquor Card.

So – all that remains of the “Rum Bum Lash” Navy is the “Rum” – but nowadays Rum is not free – but you get “Military Rum” at concessional rates.

And though the Navy has outlawed “Bum” – there still remain the “Bum Jobs” plenty of which you have to do in the Navy.

BUM   (“Bum Jobs”)

After slogging for 5 years as an Officer in the Navy – afloat and ashore – I was “selected” to undergo the 2 year M. Tech. course at IIT Delhi (Indian Institute of Technology New Delhi)

On completion of my post graduation (M.Tech.) – I was posted to the military “Babudom” in Delhi – what we in the Navy jokingly referred to as the landlocked “Northern Naval Command”.

Though ostensibly it was an R&D billet (in consonance with my recently acquired M.Tech. qualification) – in actual fact – I was a pen-pusher – a “Babu” in Uniform.

I clearly remember the first day I reported to my new job after completing my M. Tech. at IIT Delhi (and my “initiation – described in an earlier post in my blog) .

I sat in front of the Director (a Commodore).

Along with me sat a Commander who had also reported on the same day.

I was waiting for the usual “motivational mumbo jumbo” – the customary Navy Sermon on sincerity and hard-work, the “service before self” motto – or, maybe – an “inspiring” moral lecture on devotion to duty, diligence and the “Chetwode Credo”.

Instead – the first sentence the Commodore said to us was:

“Have you made your liquor cards…?”

“No, Sir…” the Commander said, “I have just come to Delhi last week.”

“You better go to the CSD canteen right now and get your liquor card made fast…” the Commodore told the Commander.

“Aye Aye, Sir…” the Commander said.

Then the Commodore looked at me – and he said to me:

“You also do the same thing and get your liquor card made fast. It is very important to have a liquor card – especially here in New Delhi.”

I wondered why the Commodore was interested in the fact whether we had liquor cards or not.

Maybe in New Delhi – as compared to ships – the work here sitting in office was so tough – that we would require a few drinks in the evening to de-stress and unwind.

But – the next sentence of the Commodore flummoxed me completely.

The Commodore said to both of us:

“I want your liquor cards. So – the moment you get your liquor cards – make sure you give me your liquor cards…”

I looked at the Commodore – quite perplexed – wondering why he was so interested in our liquor cards.

I was about to ask the Commodore why he wanted my liquor card – when suddenly – his phone rang – he was wanted by the Admiral – so he left his office.

Soon – our duties were allocated.

Surprisingly – I had been given an independent assignment – though I was an Assistant Director – whereas the Commander was asked to look after day-to-day office administration – euphemistically called “coordination” – though he was a Deputy Director.

Those days – around 36 years ago – in the early 1980’s – in the “Uniformed Babudom” of the “Northern Naval Command” – the Head of a Directorate was a Captain or Commodore – who was called Director.

Commanders were Deputy Directors (DD) – and Lieutenant Commanders/Lieutenants were Assistant Directors (AD).

Sometimes – there was an additional Captain – and he was called Joint Director (JD).

However – we are a feudal society – obsessed with rank and status.

The uniformed bureaucracy is in constant “competition” with the civilian bureaucracy for “one-upmanship” game – and these designations were suitably “upgraded” after various cadre reviews – and new designations like “Principal Director” were created.

The whole thing is quite confusing – and whether all this has achieved anything or improved working efficiency – I really do not know.

Hey – I have digressed.

Coming back to our story – probably the Commander was rankled by this “unjust” allocation of duties – so he protested:

“Sir – I am senior – but I have been given “Coordination” which should be done by an Assistant Director.”

The Commodore looked at me – and he said to me:

“Okay – you look after “Coordination” in addition to your duties.”

This was going to be quite a heavy burden – my regular duties plus coordination – so I asked the Commodore:

“Sir – do you want me to look after “Coordination” in addition to my duties…?”

“Yes – you will do both the jobs…” the Commodore said.

The Commander had been hoping to get my job.

But now – it appeared that he had been rendered jobless.

So – looking confused – the Commander asked the Commodore:

“Sir – what should I do…?”

“I have thought of something new for you – “Special Projects” – you will be DD (Special Projects)…” the Commodore said.

The Commander seemed to be happy about his new “prestigious” designation.

It was only after a few days that the Commander realized that “Special Projects” was a euphemism for “Bum Jobs”.

I will not go into the details of these “Bum Jobs” – because you may not believe me – but it will suffice to say that the Commander was reduced to being the full-time “lackey” of the Commodore.

I marvelled at the fast thinking, quick-wittedness and ingenuity of the Commodore.

In a flash of a moment – he had killed two birds with one stone.

Firstly – he had satisfied the Commander’s “grievance” by giving him a high-sounding designation.

And – secondly – he had also created a glorified batman (“sahayak”) for himself.

(I doubt whether any Army Officer can boast of a “sahayak” of the rank of Lieutenant Colonel).

Once the adroit Commodore observed the keenness of the eager-beaver Commander to please the Commodore – he started using the Commander for all his personal work.

We felt surprised that Commander seemed quite happy at being the Commodore’s flunky.

Once – in our presence – when the Commander’s course-mate asked him that if he did not feel humiliated doing such demeaning work – the Commander replied:

“What can I do…?

It is all for a good ACR.

I know this Commodore well – if you unquestioningly do whatever he tells you to do – then he gives you an excellent ACR – otherwise he can be quite stingy.

I have served with him before and let me tell you one thing – it is only because of him that I am a Commander today.

If it were not for the thumping ACRs he gave me – I would never have become a Commander…” 

I was bewildered to hear the Commander speak in this manner.

(This story happened many years before the AVS 2006 Cadre Review when Commander was made a time-scale promotion – in those days – 36 years ago – in the early 1980’s – Commander was a select rank).

The Commander’s last statement was true.

He should have never become a Commander.

It seemed that “The Peter Principle” had not worked in his case – and he had been promoted well beyond his level of competence.

By the way – his bootlicking ways continued to pay him rich dividends – and he managed to rise to even higher ranks.

BOOTLICKING

One day the “Bootlicker” Commander called me to his office – and he asked me:

“Why haven’t you given your liquor card to the Commodore…?”

I did not reply.

There was no way I was going to surrender my liquor card – Military Rum was my birthright – and my liquor card was my lifeline to happiness and joy.

Those were my glorious drinking days – my halcyon navy days when drinking and eating were my main epicurean passions.

Yes – those days – I was such a passionate drinker that – I would have gladly handed over my identity card rather than my liquor card...!!!

I tried to avoid answering – but the Commander said:

“You can give your liquor card to me – now I am handling all affairs of the Commodore.”

“Sir – I cannot give you my liquor card…” I said firmly.

“But – the Commodore desires that you give him your liquor card…” the Commander persisted.

“Then – let him desire…” I said.

“What do you mean by that…?” the Commander said angrily.

“Sir – I am a heavy drinker – and I require my full monthly liquor quota – I cannot spare even a single peg of rum – leave alone a bottle…” I said.

“I will have to report this to the Commodore…” he threatened.

“Sir – please tell me – why does the Commodore want our liquor cards…? Is the Commodore “alcohol-dependent” or something…? Is the Commodore an alcoholic…?” I asked.

“Alcoholic…? The Commodore is a teetotaller – he does not touch alcohol…” the Commander said.

“If the Commodore is a teetotaller – why does he want my liquor card…?” I asked.

“Why don’t you try to understand…? This is Delhi. We have to keep the Babus” happy…” the Commander said.

“I don’t understand…” I said.

“Once in a while – we have to give a bottle or two to the Babus” – so that they clear our files quickly…” the Commander said.

“But – isn’t it their job to clear files quickly…?” I asked.

The Commander gave me a long lecture:

“Yes – but the civilian “Babus” at the ministry can always raise queries, delay, stonewall – and hold up files.

And – after all – the ACR of our boss depends on how fast he can get proposals cleared by the ministry.

That is why our Commodore is doing so well – he has got a fantastic reputation that he can get anything sanctioned fast – he can get approvals cleared quickly – whereas his counterparts keep going round in circles.

With so many Commodores sweating it out for promotion – it is very stiff competition to become an Admiral – and our boss surely wants to be the first in his batch to become an Admiral.

So what is the harm in a bit of mamool – a rum bottle here or there – to lubricate the system – like “speed money” in other offices – here we have “speed booze” – to speed up things.

Out here in Delhi – if you keep the Babus happy – then you will do well in your career.

We must to be loyal to our Commodore – if he does well – then he will be happy – and he will give everyone good ACRs – and we will all do well too…”

I heard his long sermon – and then I said:

“Sir – Military Quota Liquor is not meant for Civilians – it is written on each and every bottle that this CSD Military Liquor is strictly meant for consumption of Defence Personnel Only….”

“You shut up…!!! Don’t think you are too damn smart. I know all this…” the Commander said angrily, “if you want to be dogmatic and not cooperate – I will tell the Commodore about your obstinate behaviour – but let me tell you that your “rigid attitude” will not help you in your Navy Career…”

Thereafter – no one asked me for my liquor card.

But – from time to time – the Commodore used to comment to me that “drinking was not good for health”.

Meanwhile – I felt ashamed whenever I saw the Bootlicker Commander toadying in an obsequious manner before minor civilian “Babus” – sometimes giving them rum bottles – ostensibly to “get the work done”.

It hurt me to see how unbridled ambition had reduced this senior officer into a disgusting ass-kisser with no self respect.

One day the Bootlicker Commander came to my office – and he asked me:

“Have you got your liquor card with you…?”

“Sir – I told you…” I began to protest.

“No. I don’t want your liquor card. I want two bottles of whisky – one bottle of rum – and some bottles of beer – I want this booze for myself…” the Commander said.

“For yourself…? You want liquor for yourself, Sir…?” I said, taken aback.

“Yes. I want the liquor for myself. I am having a party at home…” he said.

“Sir – if you want the booze for yourself – why don’t you take it on your own liquor card…?” I asked.

“My liquor card is with the Commodore – and the monthly liquor quota on my liquor card has already been exhausted by the Commodore by distributing liquor bottles here and there. So – I was wondering if you could spare a few bottles from your quota…” the Commander pleaded.

I did not know whether I should laugh or cry.

I felt pity for the Commander – it was sad that sycophancy and boot-licking had reduced him to this pitiable state.

“Sure, Sir. I will go to the CSD Canteen right now – and I will get you whatever booze you want….” I said to the Bootlicker Commander.

The Commander’s lips smiled at me – but his eyes said it all.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/humor-in-uniform-i-want-your-liquor-card.html

This post is an abridged updated extract of my story THE CRAZY COMMODORE – Part 3 : THE BOOTLICKER COMMANDER AND RUM RAJ  earlier posted in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog on 25 November 2013 Posted by me Vikram Karve in this blog at 11/25/2013 12:51:00 PM at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/11/humor-in-uniform-unforgettable.html  and later reposted at urls:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/12/humor-in-uniform-rum-bum-and-bootlicking.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/03/humor-in-uniform-rum-bum-bootlicking.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/09/humor-in-uniform-liquor-quota-last.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/05/memories-of-navy-babudom-rum-bum-and.html etc

Do You Have a Good Online Reputation…?

July 20, 2017

ONLINE REPUTATION MANAGEMENT (ORM) MADE SIMPLE 

Are you aware of your Digital Footprint, Web Identity and Online Reputation…?

Sometime ago – I had an interesting discussion with a fellow writer/author turned Blogger at a Bloggers Meet.

He asked me:

“Is it important to be active on the internet – especially on the social media…?”

“Yes…” I said, “because if you don’t take charge of your online reputation – then someone else will…”

My friend wanted me to explain in detail.

Since we were talking on our mobile cellphones – I told him that I had written on this topic 4 years ago in the year 2013 – and – I promised him that I would update that article and post it on my blog for him and other interested readers to read.

So – here is the updated article…

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/04/are-you-aware-of-your-digital-footprint.html

DIGITAL FOOTPRINT, WEB IDENTITY AND ONLINE REPUTATION

Is Your “Online Reputation” Overshadowing Your “Offline Reputation”…?

Tips for Managing Your Web Identity By Vikram Karve

DIGITAL FOOTPRINT

Soon – a time will come when:

Your “Digital” Footprint will carry more weight than what you write on your Resume or CV.

I am sure you know the meaning of the term “DIGITAL FOOTPRINT”.

Your digital footprint is the record or trail left by all the things you do online on the internet.

Your Digital Footprint includes all your Social Media activity (on Social Networking Sites like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Quora, WhatsApp, Instagram, Snapchat etc) – your Blogging and Online Writing – all information about you on the internet – on various websites – your browsing history – your online subscriptions – any photo galleries and videos you have uploaded or others have uploaded about you – essentially, anything on the Internet with your name on it.

Anything you post, tweet, comment, or “like” on a blog/social media – or what others post about you – is going down as a permanent record in cyberspace on your digital footprint.

In a nutshell – your digital footprint is everything on the internet that is about you.

Since you rarely think twice about putting things online – your digital footprint can be pretty large and extensive without you even realizing it.

Have you ever “Googled” yourself…?

An easy way to check out your digital footprint is to “Google” your own name – and you will be amazed when you see number of hits and the extensive and diverse information about you on the internet.

ONLINE REPUTATION

In today’s world you have Two Reputations:

  1. OFFLINE REPUTATION (in the physical real world)
  1. ONLINE REPUTATION (in the virtual world or cyberspace)

Unless you are a celebrity – your “offline reputation” is restricted and known to only those persons in your proximity, at work, in your social circles and personal life.

However – your “online reputation” is all pervasive – and is available for scrutiny by anyone throughout the world who has access to the internet.

If I want to know about you – all I have to do is to “google” your name or search your details on websites, search engines or social networks.

Potential employers – or prospective spouses – or those desirous of getting into a relationship with you – can easily carry out a basic background check on you by just surfing the internet.

(Earlier – before the advent of the internet – you had to ask some mutual acquaintance – or make discreet inquiries – or hire a detective to find out information about somebody)

The fact of the matter is that – in today’s connected world – your online reputation is easily accessible – and it matters more than your offline reputation.

In the same way that your personality (real-world offline identity) is important for your offline reputation – your online identity plays an important role in determining your online reputation.

ONLINE IDENTITY

Your ONLINE IDENTITY consists of two things:

  1. What you say about yourself on the internet (your “Owned Identity”)
  1. What others say about you on the internet (your “Earned Identity”)

OWNED IDENTITY

Your OWNED IDENTITY comprises whatever information you upload on the internet.

Your owned identity will comprise so many things like:

  1. Whatever you upload on social networking sites like Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Quora, WhatsApp, Snapchat etc including your profiles, pictures, photos, status reports, tweets, comments – anything and everything you upload about yourself.
  1. Your Blogs
  1. Your Websites (personal, professional and company)
  1. All your writings and postings on the web which you post on the internet on various websites, online journals and e-magazines, forums, networks, groups, emails, documents, presentations – anything and everything you put on the internet.
  1. Various “profiles” and “avatars” you create on the web – like, for example, your profiles on job search sites and matrimonial sites.

To put it metaphorically – your owned identity is like when you get yourself inked with a permanent tattoo – it can never be fully erased.

EARNED IDENTITY

Your EARNED IDENTITY is what others “say” about you on the internet.

Your earned identity includes:

  1. Information about you on Social Networking Sites like postings about you on Facebook by your friends (status, tags, pictures, photos, comments), recommendations and endorsements on LinkedIn, Retweets/Mentions of your Tweets by others on Twitter etc
  1. Articles, Blog Posts, Wikis, Biographical Writings etc written about you which are available on the internet (these are things written about you by others –what you write about yourself on the internet becomes a part of your owned identity)
  1. Various “profiles” created by others about you at various places on the web.
  1. Various networks and websites that link to you
  1. Miscellaneous information about you available on the internet – for example, your examination results uploaded online by your university, education board, UPSC etc or results of job selection interviews promulgated online.

To use a metaphor  your Earned Identity is like “Branding” an animal – where a permanent mark is stamped on you by someone else.

YOUR ONLINE REPUTATION IS A COMBINATION OF BOTH YOUR “ONLINE IDENTITIES”:

  1. YOUR OWNED IDENTITY (in Your Control) 

and

  1. YOUR EARNED IDENTITY (Not in Your Control)

Your “owned identity” is in your control.

You must be circumspect about what you upload on the internet.

Even a small slip-up online – like an injudicious piece of writing on your blog – an indiscreet photo, an imprudent relationship status update or a stray remark on social networks – or a careless comment – has the potential of damaging your reputation in future – and may cause you harm in your offline life.

Your “earned identity” is not in your control.

Sometimes – your “earned identity” matters more than your “owned identity”.

This is because people may be curious to find out what others have to say about you – than what you say about yourself.

Even if you avoid the internet altogether  you cannot avoid having an “earned identity”.

This is because someone else may upload some writing or material about you on the web – especially if you are a celebrity – or remain in the news for something or the other.

That is why famous people – like ancient philosophers, politicians and writers – who lived much before the advent of internet – have “earned identities” – and consequently they have “online reputations”.

So remember – going offline and avoiding the internet is not the solution – it is similar to a pigeon closing its eyes to avoid seeing danger – or an “ostrich burying his head in the sand” approach.

In today’s information technology driven connected world – you cannot afford to bury your head in the sand like an ostrich – and live in denial.

You cannot avoid an online reputation.

Whether you like it or not – whether you use internet or not – you will have an online reputation.

So – it is in your interest to be aware of your digital footprint, web identity and online reputation  and try your best to manage these to your advantage.

MANAGING YOUR DIGITAL FOOTPRINT, WEB IDENTITY AND ONLINE REPUTATION

Do a simple experiment.

Just “Google” your name and see the results of the search.

What are the top few results?

How many “hits” pertain to your “owned reputation”…?

How many “hits” pertain to your “earned reputation”… ?

Which “hits” appear on top and on the first page…?

If you want to manage your online reputation – you must ensure that links pertaining to “owned reputation” (what you say about yourself) appear as the top search results – as compared to “earned reputation” (what others say about you).

As far as your online reputation is concerned – what you say about yourself (owned reputation) – must have more prominence – than what others say about you (earned reputation).

Remember that your “owned identity” and “owned reputation” are in your control – because you can always control what you want to “say” about yourself on the internet.

But  your “earned identity” and “earned reputation” may not be in your full control  since you cannot control what others say about you on the internet.

Therefore – in a nutshell – if you want to control your online reputation – you will have to “say” more about yourself on the internet – than others “say” about you.

How do you do this…?

It is simple.

Get active on the internet – Blog regularly – Tweet vigorously – and maintain a dynamic presence on social networking sites like Facebook, LinkedIn, Google+, Quora, Instagram etc and on various Forums and Groups – and make sure you network effectively.

You must be conscious of your online reputation.

With the proliferation of the internet – your “online reputation” will overshadow your “offline reputation”.

Remember – if someone wants to do a background check on you, for whatever reason – to hire you for a job – to check you out as a marriage prospect – or they just want to find out more about you – all they have to do is to “google” your name.

Then – they can ingeniously delve a bit – and explore your online identity (web shadow) – and discover your online reputation – yes – all that will matter is your online reputation.

Therefore – it is imperative that you establish an effective web presence – and be proactively conscious of your digital footprint, web identity and online reputation.

You must be careful to build a good online reputation.

Once you do that – you must make constant efforts to monitor your digital footprint – and – manage your online reputation meticulously

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

These are my personal views. I am not an IT Professional or SEO Expert. I am a simple internet user, a Blogger and user of Social Networks. These tips are based on my personal experience. They may or may not work for you, so please do your own due diligence while using the internet.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/04/are-you-aware-of-your-digital-footprint.html

Revised and Updated Version of My Article First Posted by me Vikram Karve at 9/13/2013 05:58:00 PM (13 Sep 2013) under the title:ONLINE REPUTATION MANAGEMENT Tips for Building and Managing Your Web Identity By VIKRAM KARVE on this blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/09/online-reputation-management.html  and later revised and posted online by me a number of times including at urls:   http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/09/digital-footprint-and-online-reputation.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/11/is-your-online-reputation-overshadowing.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/03/digital-identity-how-to-manage-your.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/online-reputation-management-made-simple.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/how-to-manage-your-online-reputation.html  etc

Sharing Caring Love and Affection

July 20, 2017

SHARING CARING LOVE and AFFECTION

A Fictional Spoof By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/10/housemates.html

Part 1 : SHARING

Circa 1978

Our ship was getting ready to leave Cochin (Kochi) harbour.

(Those days – Kochi was called Cochin)

A Lieutenant in uniform came running up the gangway.

He gave me a packet and said: “Can you please deliver this packet to my coursemate Lieutenant “X” in Bombay…”

(Those days – Mumbai was known as Bombay)

It was a small packet.

“Sure… I said.

“It is just some Ayurvedic Medicines for my coursemate’s wife – the name of my coursemate (Lieutenant “X”) – and his home address – everything is written on the packet…” the Lieutenant said.

On the day we reached Mumbai – in the evening – I stood outside the flat of Lieutenant “X”.

I rang the doorbell.

A chic young woman opened the door.

She was very attractive – and – I had to make an effort to take my eyes off her.

“Good evening, Ma’am – I have got your medicines from Cochin…” I said.

“My medicines…?” she said, looking confused.

Lieutenant “X” lives here, isn’t it – so – you must be his wife…?” I said.

The beautiful woman smiled at me – and she said:

“Yes – Lieutenant “X” lives here – but  I am not his wife…”

“Oh…” I remarked.

“I am so sorry,” the woman said, “it was so rude of me to keep you waiting outside – please come in and make yourself comfortable. Let me get you a glass of water…”

I entered the drawing room and sat down on the sofa.

The woman got me a glass of water and sat down opposite me.

I placed the packet I had got from Cochin on the table – and I said to the woman: “Here are the Ayurvedic Medicines for Mrs. “X” – is she not at home…?”

“No – Mrs. “X” works late – she should be home around 7:30 – but – don’t worry – I will give her the packet…” the woman said.

“Are you her sister…?” I asked.

“No – No…” the woman interrupted me.

The gorgeous women gave me a alluring smile – and she said to me:

“I am Mrs. “Y” – we are still waiting to be allotted our married accomodation – this house has been allotted to Lieutenant “X” – my husband Lieutenant “Y” and your friend Lieutenant “X” are coursemates – so – we are sharing accommodation with Lieutenant and Mrs. “X” …”

(In the 1970’s – there was a severe shortage of married accommodation in the Navy – especially in Mumbai – and the waiting time for Lieutenants was more than 2 years – so it was common practice for young Navy couples to share accommodation with their friends who were lucky to have been allotted married accommodation. Also – those days – most Lieutenants were married – since it took 11 years commissioned service to become a Lieutenant Commander – unlike today – after the AVS 2006 Cadre Review Bonanza – when you become a Lieutenant Commander in just 6 years service)

“Are you also a coursemate of Lieutenant “X” and my husband…?” Mrs. “Y” asked me.

“No – No – Ma’am – they must be a few years senior to me…” I said.

“Oh – so you are a friend of Lieutenant “X”…?” she said.

“No – Ma’am – I haven’t even met Lieutenant “X” – a Naval Officer in Cochin came to my ship and asked me to deliver this packet to Lieutenant “X”…” I said.

“Oh…” she said.

I looked at Mrs. “Y”.

Mrs. “Y” looked at me.

Sitting opposite me  Mrs. “Y” looked very gorgeous and alluring – and I felt mesmerized by her tantalizing beauty.

I was unnerved by the attraction I felt towards her – so I thought that it would be best for me to leave the scene…

So – I got up to leave.

“No – wait – it is already 5:30 – Lieutenant “X” should be home any minute…” Mrs. “Y” said.

“And – your husband – Lieutenant “Y” – he should be home too…?”

“No – my husband is sailing – he will be back next week…” Mrs. “Y” said.

The doorbell rang.

“Ah – that must be Lieutenant “X”…” said Mrs. “Y” – and – she quickly went to open the door.

Lieutenant “X” was in uniform.

He kept his scooter helmet on the rack.

Then – he looked at me.

I stood up.

I introduced myself.

“Oh yes – thanks a lot for getting the Ayurvedic Medicines…” Lieutenant “X” said.

“You are welcome, Sir…” I said.

“Hey – I will just go in and change into ‘civvies’ and freshen up…” Lieutenant “X” said to me.

Then – Lieutenant “X” looked at Mrs. “Y” – and – he said to her: “Hey – why don’t you make some nice coffee for all of us…?”

“Filter Coffee is already ready – and – I have made your favourite upma as ‘tiffin’ too…” Mrs. “Y” said to Lieutenant “X”.

“Wow – that’s great…” Lieutenant “X” said – and he went inside to change.

After eating the delicious upma and drinking the refreshing filter coffee – I got up to leave – but Lieutenant “X” said to me: “Hey – why don’t you stay for dinner – we’ll go for a walk on the seashore – we will have a drink at the club – by then – my wife should be back – you can meet her – and – we will all have dinner together…”

“Thanks a lot, Sir – but I have to get back to my ship…” I said.

“Come on – stay for dinner…” Lieutenant “X” insisted.

“I would have loved to have dinner with you, Sir – but someone is holding the deck for me…” I lied.

“Oh – then you must go back to your ship – but you must come over and have dinner with us sometime…” Lieutenant “X” said.

So – I said goodbye to Lieutenant “X” and Mrs. “Y” – and I went back to my ship.

I could not meet Lieutenant “X” again – and the dinner never materialized – as our ship sailed off on a long deployment to the eastern seas – and midway – I was disembarked at Madras Port (Chennai) – for proceeding on transfer to a shore based instructional appointment in a ‘stone frigate’ at Jamnagar.

7 YEARS LATER

Part 2 : CARING

Circa 1985

One evening – I was walking on Main Street (MG Road) in Pune – and suddenly – I ran into Lieutenant “X”.

He recognized me and said: “Hi there – so nice to see you here…”

“Delighted to see you too, Sir…” I said.

“You just disappeared from the Radar…?” Lieutenant “X” said.

“Sir – my ship sailed off to the East – then – I was transferred to Jamnagar – then – I was selected for M. Tech. at IIT Delhi – then – I did an appointment in Delhi – and now – I have been recently appointed as faculty in IAT Pune…” I said.

“That’s great…” Lieutenant “X” said, “I too quit the Navy a few years ago and I now work in the industry…”

He pulled out his wallet – extracted a business card – and gave it to me.

I looked at the business card.

Lieutenant “X” (now Ex-Lieutenant “X”) was a Manager in a prestigious company.

“My home address is written on the reverse of the card – I live in Aundh – and now that you are Pune – you must visit us – especially if you come to Aundh side…” he said.

“Sure, Sir…” I said – and we bid each other ‘goodbye’.

A few days later – one evening – I happened to be in Aundh.

I remembered the brief meeting with Ex-Lieutenant “X” on Main Street.

I pulled out his business card from my wallet – looked at his residential address on the reverse side of the card – and I discovered that I was standing right below his apartment block.

I decided to visit Ex-Lieutenant “X” – and soon – I was standing outside his flat.

I rang the doorbell.

A woman opened the door.

I was stunned.

The woman was Mrs. “Y”.

Seeing the bewildered expression on my face – the woman gave me a mischievous smile – and she naughtily said to me:

“Yes – Lieutenant “X” lives here – and now – I am his wife…”

Part 3 : EPILOGUE

Later – when I reached home – I told my wife about how Mrs. “Y” had become Mrs. “X”

So – thanks to “sharing” and “caring” – Lieutenant “X” and Mrs. “Y” – had now become – Ex-Lieutenant “X” and New Mrs. “X” 

Later – I found out that Lieutenant “X” had not quit the Navy on his own.

But – in fact – Lieutenant “X” had been asked to resign from the Navy for stealing the affection of Mrs. “Y” – who was his brother officer’s wife”.

Housemates had become actual mates.

Lieutenant “X” had got married to Mrs. “Y” 

I wondered whether Lieutenant “Y” had got married to Mrs. “X” and the “spouse swap” was complete…?

There is a saying:

“Learn from history – or – you are doomed to repeat it”

And – my wife had certainly learnt a lesson from the story of Lieutenant “X” and Mrs. “Y” 

This was evident from the episode narrated below.

One evening – a young couple came over to meet us – my Navy coursemate and his wife.

“I have come for a 3 month course to IAT – and I brought my wife along – but they are not allowing my wife to stay in the Officers’ Mess…” he said.

“Yes – wives are not allowed for short courses…” I said.

“We were wondering if you could share your accommodation with us – you have got such a big house…” my coursemate said.

“Yes – please let us stay with you – otherwise I will have to go back…” my coursemate’s lovely wife pleaded with me – and she gave me a tender loving beseeching look.

Mesmerized by her seductive gaze – I was about to agree to my course-mate’s wife’s request to share our home with them.

But suddenly – my wife interjected and she said to the lady:

“I am sorry – but – we do not share accommodation…”

“Please let us stay in your home – it is only for 3 months – I promise you that we will not be any trouble…” my coursemate’s wife begged my wife.

“I am sorry – but – as a “matter of principle” – we do not share our home with anyone – we do not want “housemates”…” my wife said firmly with a decisive tone.

Then – my wife excused herself and went inside into the bedroom.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/10/housemates.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This is a revised re-post of my story CARING AND SHARING posted online by me Vikram Karve earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog on 08 Nov 2015 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/11/sharing-and-caring-humor-in-and-out-of.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/12/humor-in-uniform-lieutenant-x-and-mrs-y.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/03/humor-in-uniform-care-but-dont-share.html

“Roving Eye” and “Nubile Nymph”

July 19, 2017

STORY OF A ROVING EYE and a NUBILE NYMPH” 

Dear Reader – before you start reading this story – please make sure that your sense of humor is still intact – this yarn is a fictional spoof – a tall story – satire – pure fiction – just for fun and amusement – no offence is meant to anyone – so you must take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

And, yes – this story is for mature adults only – so if you are a kid – or an overly gender sensitive type – please skip this story.

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/humor-in-uniform-nubile-nymph-and.html

WINE WOMEN and OLQ (Officer Like Qualities)
A Fictional Spoof
Adult Fiction – A Tall Story
By
VIKRAM KARVE 

PROLOGUE

There is a saying in the Navy:

“If you want to know the true character of an officer – ask his coursemates…”

Seniors will have one view of an officer – juniors will have another view – but it is his peers who will know the officer inside-out – especially his course-mates who have seen the officer from close quarters from academy days.

So – if you want to know about me – what type of Naval Officer I was – please ask my Navy coursemates – or ask my shipmates – who are of roughly of my seniority – who were my peers in uniform.

However – in the Navy – as far your career prospects are concerned – your character does not matter much.

It is your image (spoken reputation) which matters most.

This is because – unfortunately – in the Navy – your course-mates do not write your all-important ACR (Annual Confidential Report) which is the “be-all and end-all” Performance Appraisal Report in the Defence Services.

Your ACR is written by your seniors – known as “superior officers” in the Navy.

And – as far as your “superior officers” are concerned – they will mark your ACR depending on how they perceive you – yes – you will be judged by your image rather than your performance

So – in a nutshell:

Image replaces Performance…

This dictum is very true in the Navy.

The key to career success is Image Management.

Unfortunately for me – for no fault of mine – owing to series of happenings beyond my control – in the Navy – especially as far as my senior officers were concerned – I developed a rather “notorious“ image.

And once you are branded with an notorious image – fate conspires in such a way – that it is a downhill spiral all the way.

Even good deeds boomerang – as this story illustrates.

Dear Reader – before you start reading this story – please make sure that your sense of humor is still intact – this yarn is a spoof – pure fiction – just for fun and amusement – no offence is meant to anyone – so you must take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh. And, yes – this story is for mature adults only – so if you are a kid – or an overly gender sensitive type – please skip this story.

I am sure you have heard of the three vices: “Wine Women and Horses”

Now – here is a story about: “Wine Women and Officers” 

Instead of “horses” we have “officers” – yes – officers in lieu of horses – as they say in the Navy.

The “wine” in the story is not really wine – it is something much stronger – liquor – booze – an alcoholic spirit called Rum.

And – maybe – instead of “officers” – it is more a story about OLQ (Officer Like Qualities).

So – it may be more appropriate to call the story: “Wine Women and OLQ”

This happened long back – almost 25 years ago – in the 1990’s – so you must take yourself back in time – relax – and enjoy this story in a leisurely manner.

“DRAMATIS PERSONAE” (MAIN CHARACTERS)

There are a few women in the story – but there is only one “main character” – the “heroine” of the story – a beautiful “Nubile Nymph” – let us call her “N”.

The other women in the story are side characters – like “extras” in a movie.

And as far as the male protagonists are concerned – there are 4 Naval Officers in the story:

“C” – The Horny Commodore with a “Roving Eye” who has the “hots” for “N” (the “Nubile Nymph”)

“A” – The Ambitious Husband of “N” (the “Nubile Nymph”)

“S” – A Naval Officer – The maverick neighbour of “A” and “N”

To describe “S” in a nutshell – well – let’s say that “S” is more interested in “Wine” rather than “Women”

And – of course – the 4th protagonist is ME – yours truly.

Yes – I am the 4th protagonist in this story – the narrator of this story – who is going to tell you the story.

So – there are 5 protagonists in this story:

  1. “N” (“Nubile Nymph”)
  2. “C” (Horny Commodore with a “Roving Eye” who has the “hots” for Nubile Nymph “N”)
  3. “A” (Ambitious Husband of “N”)
  4. “S” (Maverick neighbour of “A” and “N”)
  5.  Me (Narrator of this Story)

Let’s start with “N” – the “heroine”.

As I told you – we had nicknamed her “Nubile Nymph”

But – in reality – she was neither “nubile” – nor was she a “nymph”.

In fact – she was very much married.

Also – before you start getting wrong ideas about the “nymph” part – let me tell you that in actual fact “N” was not a sex maniac – she was just a tease – she acted seductive and sexy – just to arouse the Horny” Commodore.

Yes – “Nubile Nymph” “N” was a tease – from time to time she gave the Horny Commodore the “come hither look” – which got him all excited.

From the moment she had met him – Nubile Nymph “N” had observed that the Horny Commodore “C” had a “Roving Eye”.

“N” had instantly noticed that “C” had the “hots” for her.

“N” knew that she was sexually attractive – and that most men were mesmerized by her.

If “N” had wanted – she could have had the Horny Commodore on a platter.

Yes – “C” was going crazy about “N” – desperately waiting for an opportunity to “steal her affections”.

But – “N” was not interested in romancing with the Commodore.

“N” was not at all interested in having a full-fledged affair with “C”.

She was interested in furthering her own husband’s career.

“N” knew that in the Navy – a wife’s status depends on her husband’s rank

“N” knew her husband’s limitations.

Her husband “A” was quite a mediocre type as compared to his competitors.

But – “N” had overcome all that by enticing the Horny Commodore “C” by her tantalizing charms.

“N” was an accomplished tease – and she sure knew how to keep men drooling for her.

“N” teased the Horny Commodore “C” – she titivated for him, wearing sexy outfits –  and gave him impish looks – and flirted with him – just to keep his hopes alive.

“N” had succeeded in doing this for the last one year – her efforts had ensured that her husband “A” had got the best possible performance appraisal – what they call in the Navy a “thumping ACR” – from “C”.

Now “N” knew that she had to continue to keep the fires burning in the Horny Commodore’s loins till the Horny Commodore “C” wrote her husband’s next ACR just before the promotion board.

“N” was clear about her strategy.

Once her husband was promoted – and they moved on – there would be a new boss who she would have to work on – to mesmerize and to bring under her spell.

Meanwhile – the Horny Commodore “C” was going crazy.

He had heard wild rumours about stealing affections, wife swapping, swinging and key-chain parties – but all those fantastic orgies lay in his imagination – since in his actual life – he had never seen anything like that happening.

But now things seemed to be looking up – and the way “N” was tempting him – his hopes had been kindled.

The Horny Commodore “C” desperately wanted to have a go at the Nubile Nymph “N” – but he did not have the guts to go ahead.

Of course, in his imagination “C” had wild fantasies about himself rollicking with “N”.

But – in actual life – “C” was unable to realize his fantasies with “N” because he was shit scared of his own lawfully wedded wife who was a shrew and a real tough cookie.

The Horny Commodore’s wife knew of her husband’s proclivity for beautiful young women – especially his officers’ wives – and that is why she kept an eagle eye on him – she let her husband’s eye rove a bit – but she kept her husband in firm check.

The Horny Commodore’s wife let him give Nubile Nymph the “glad eye” – she let her husband “C” flirt with “N” – but otherwise she kept him on a tight leash.

Metaphorically speaking – the Horny Commodore’s situation was akin to a drooling dog desperately yearning for a bitch in heat – but unable to go ahead and mount her – since he is held back firmly on leash by the master.

I told you about “C” (the Horny Commodore).

I told you about “N” (the Nubile Nymph).

Now let me tell you about “A” – the husband of Nubile Nymph “N”.

There are two types of ambitious officers in the Navy.

The first type take their Naval careers seriously from the moment they join the Navy.

The second type of Naval Officers comprise carefree bachelors – who suddenly turn ambitious the moment they get married.

“A” was of the second type.

His wife “N” was the driving force behind him – as far as his career was concerned.

“A” was quite happy with what “N” was doing.

“A” knew that it was thanks to his wife N’s efforts – that he “A” – had become the Commodore’s blue eyed boy.

The Careerist Officer “A” knew that his ambitious wife “N” would help him reach great heights of success.

THE STORY

Now that I have told you about the characters – let me begin to tell you the story.

It was a Monday evening – my “non-drinking day” – and I was walking along the banks of the lake – enjoying the resplendent spectacle of the orange sun being swallowed up by the calm blue waters.

My reverie was disturbed by “A” who suddenly came behind me – almost dashing me with his scooter.

He wanted some training handbook.

“Hey – I am on my evening walk. The book is in my house. I will give it to you tomorrow in office…” I said.

“I want it urgently to prepare for tomorrow – I have a lecture in the morning…” he said, “I had gone to your house, but your wife told me you would be here.”

Irritated – I went with “A” on his scooter to my house.

I asked “A” to wait outside – and I went inside, to my study, to get the book he wanted.

I was disappointed to see him sitting in the drawing room – my darling wife had invited him in.

I gave “A” the book he wanted.

Meanwhile – my wife had got him a glass of water – and asked him whether he would like to have a cup of tea.

“A” looked at his watch – then he looked at me – and he said to me:

“Tea…? It’s already past sunset – let’s have a drink.”

“It is my non-drinking day…” I said rudely.

“So what…? You can surely offer your guest a drink…” my wife said – giving me a rude look of disbelief at my atrocious social graces and bad manners.

I made him a rather stiff drink of Rum.

“How about you…?” he asked.

So – just for appearances – I poured myself a very mild drink of Rum and Water (Rum-Pani)

Though I enjoyed my drinks – especially “Rum-Pani” – the fact was that I was not in the mood for drinking on that day – especially in the company of “A”.

I noticed that “A” was drinking quite fast – he had already finished his first drink – so I poured him one more.

“A” gulped down his second drink too – he drank very fast – down the hatch.

I poured him one more.

I was amazed at the speed at which “A” was drinking.

“A” was drinking as if it was his last day on earth.

Meanwhile – as was his habit – “A” was bumming my cigarettes too – lighting up cigarette after cigarette.

“I am enjoying myself…” said “A” – slurring, drinking and puffing away.

Looking quite drunk – “A” said to me:

“My wife does not let me smoke – she does not let me drink – she keeps nagging me – so now – I am really enjoying myself…”

Suddenly – the cigarette dropped from his lips – and sweat broke out on his forehead.

I knew the signs – “A” was heavily drunk.

In fact – he was terribly drunk.

I wondered what to do.

But – before I could do anything – suddenly – “A” got up swiftly – he staggered out of the house – and he started his scooter – and he drove off.

I noticed that “A” was driving his scooter in a meandering fashion – like a sinusoidal wave.

“Go fast…” my wife said, “and see that “A” reaches home safely.”

I took my scooter – started it – and started driving towards his house.

There was no trace of “A” or his scooter.

Suddenly – I heard a voice calling out to me.

It was “S” – who was the next door neighbour of “A”.

“S” was walking on the road – on his way to the officers mess bar – for his daily evening drinking session – when he saw “A” driving his scooter into a ditch.

As far as drinking alcohol was concerned – “S” enjoyed a much “better” reputation than me.

If I was a “drinker” – then “S” was a “drunkard”.

But right now – “S” was dead sober.

I stopped my scooter.

We went down into the ditch – and we saw that “A” had passed out – he was dead drunk.

Luckily – “A” was not injured.

We – “S” and Me – we both hauled up “A” – and we dragged him up the slope.

“His scooter is still down there…” I said.

“S” said to me:

“Sir – let the scooter be there – I will send someone to retrieve it in the morning.”

“Shall we take him to the MI Room? It think it is best we call the doctor too,” I asked.

“S” looked at “A” – and then “S” said to me:

“He is not hurt much – just a few bruises – let’s take him home. Anyway – the Doctor stays in our block – so – if required – I will call him.”

So – we mounted the drunk “A” on my scooter – Me sitting in front driving the scooter – “A” in between – and “S” behind holding tightly the limp and lifeless “A”.

It was a most difficult scooter drive – as the dead drunk “A” swung from side to side with “S” desperately clinging on.

Finally – we reached our destination.

It was not even 8 o’clock – and there was quite a big crowd outside the block.

A birthday party was just over – and lots of children – and their parents – officers and their wives – they were all standing there – chit chatting – before they went home.

We – “S” and M– we both lifted the dead drunk “A” on our shoulders – “S” taking the left arm of“A” – with the right arm of the inebriated “A” over my shoulders.

Dear Reader – please try to picture the scene.

Officers, their Wives, Children and Servants – all of them watching us carrying a totally intoxicated dead drunk “A” towards his house.

Suddenly – Nubile Nymph “N” came out on her first floor balcony.

Obviously – “N” was shocked to see her husband “A” in this pitiable drunken state – being carried by “S” and Me

It must have been embarrassing for “N” to see her drunk husband “A” being carried by “S” and Me – both of us were the two known acknowledged “drunkards” of the place.

Some officers came to help us – and we carried the totally intoxicated “A” up the stairs – and we deposited him on his bed.

GETTING THE BOTTLE

Next morning – the Horny Commodore “C” called me to his office.

“C” was furious.

“I know “S” is a bloody drunkard – but I did not expect you to do this…” he shouted.

“Sir – please listen…” I pleaded.

“C” interrupted me – and he started shouting at me:

“Why did you force drinks on “A” and get him drunk…?

Do you know how upset his wife “N” is…?

She was so distressed that she rang me up at night – and I had to rush to her place.

You buggers had got “A” so badly drunk that he was puking all over the place – and I had to call the doctor.

I am very disappointed with you.

And – as far as “S” is concerned – I am going to take disciplinary action against him…” Horny Commodore “C” said to me.

I pleaded to the Horny Commodore “C”:

“Sir – “S” wasn’t even there.

It was “A” who came to my house.

It was “A” who asked me for a drink and then he got drunk.

In fact – yesterday was Monday – my “non-drinking day” – you can ask my wife.

And – when “A” fell off the scooter – it was “S” who helped him out.

Sir – it is “A” who is the real culprit – not “S” or Me…” I said.

But – the Horny Commodore “C” was in no mood to listen to me – and he shouted at me:

“Don’t give me bullshit. I know buggers like you. And – I know your bloody dirty game – get a husband drunk and …”

“Sir – please don’t insinuate …” I interrupted angrily.

Seeing my angry tone – “C” held his tongue.

I looked at “C”  and I said to him:

“And Sir – by the way – your “blue-eyed” Boy “A” is not a “Baby” – who can be forced to drink by thrusting a nipple into his mouth…”

Then – I angrily left his office without saluting.

That evening – I sat with “S” in the bar.

As we enjoyed our drinks – we laughed at the whole episode.

It was “A” who had behaved like a jackass.

And it was we two – “S” and Me – who got a bad name.

EPILOGUE

Out of the three of us – “A”“S” and M– who do you think was most successful in his Naval Career…?

You guessed right.

“S” and Me – we both of us “fell by the wayside”.

And – it was “A” who reached high rank – duly propelled upwards in his career by his ambitious wife “N” – the Nubile Nymph

Ha Ha – “Roving Eye” – the Horny Commodore (“C”) – maybe he is probably still desperately yearning for Nubile Nymph” (“N”) – even after his retirement.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/humor-in-uniform-nubile-nymph-and.html

This story was written by me Vikram Karve more than 3 years ago in January 2014 and earlier posted online by me Vikram Karve on 22 March 2014 at 3/22/2014 12:02:00 AM in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/03/humor-in-uniform-wine-women-and.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/03/humor-in-uniform-wine-women-and.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/07/humor-in-uniform-bottle.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/09/humor-in-uniform-wine-women-and-olq.html etc

An “Appetizing” Kiss and a “Sexy Dish”

July 18, 2017

Outiside it is raining.

I am feeling “Hungry”.

So – let me dig deep into my creative writing archives – and pull out this delicious article I wrote long long back – more than 17 years ago in the year 2000 – a story – followed by a mouthwatering snack.

This story features in my Foodie Book APPETITE FOR A STROLL too …

Enjoy the Appetizing Kiss with a Sexy Dish …

APPETIZING KISS and SEXY DISH

A Story and A Recipe By Vikram Karve

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/a-kiss-and-dish-story-and-snack.html

There is a thing called PERCEPTION.

Do you know what the word “perception” means…?

It is all in the mind.

First – I will tell you a story.

And then – I will feed you a delicious snack.

First – Food for the Mind – and then – Food for the Body

So, Dear Reader:

Read on – the story and the recipe.

Part 1 – Food for the Mind

APPETIZING KISS

Eggs – Vodka – and – a Kiss (a story)

Long back – I heard this interesting story – a folktale – surely apocryphal – about eggs, vodka and a kiss.

Tamerlane’s wife started to build a magnificent palace for him as a surprise, while he was away at the wars, but when she got word of his imminent return, one arch, the victory arch, the Arc de Triomphe still remained unfinished.

She went directly to the architect and begged him to hurry but the architect told her he would complete the work in time only if she gave him a kiss.

“One kiss – one single kiss – just one kiss – that’s all I want from you – and I will build the most magnificent triumphal arch in the world…” the architect said to her.

Tamerlane’s wife was not only very beautiful and very virtuous, but also very clever.

She went to the market – she bought a basket of eggs – she boiled them hard – and stained them a dozen different colours – red, green, purple etc

She called the architect to the palace – showed him the basket – and told him to choose any egg he liked – and eat it.

He took a red egg and ate it.

“What does it taste like…?” she asked.

“Like an egg. It tastes like an egg…” he said.

“Eat another egg…” she said.

He took a green egg and ate it.

“What does that taste like…?” she asked.

“It tastes like an egg – just like the red egg you gave me before…” he answered.

“Try another egg…” she said.

He ate a purple egg.

“How does it taste…?” she asked.

“It tastes like an egg. One egg tastes just the same as any other egg…” he said, intrigued by all this.

“There you are…!!!” she said, “Each of these eggs looks different – but they all taste the same. It’s the same with a kiss. Women may look different – but the kiss tastes the same. So – you may kiss any one of my serving women that you like – but you must leave me alone.”

“Very well…” said the architect.

But soon – the architect came back to Tamerlane’s wife.

This time he was carrying a tray with two bowls on it.

Tamerlane’s wife looked at the two bowls and she saw that both the bowls were full of water.

“Drink from each of these bowls…” the architect said came back to Tamerlane’s wife.

Tamerlane’s wife took a drink from the first bowl.

“How does it taste…?” he architect asked Tamerlane’s wife

“Of course, it tastes like water – how else will water taste…?” she said.

“Now – you drink from the other bowl…” the architect said to Tamerlane’s wife.

Tamerlane’s wife took a sip from the first bowl.

The moment she drank from the second bowl – she coughed and spluttered.

Yes – Tamerlane’s wife went into a fit of coughing when she took a mouthful from the second bowl – because it contained vodka  – not water.

“See…” the architect said, “Look at the two bowls of Vodka and Water – Vodka and Water – they both look alike – but each tastes quite different – isn’t it…? It is the same with Love – all Love may look the same – but each Love is different…!!!”

Primed by the Vodka in her veins – Tamerlane’s wife kissed the architect on the mouth.

The moment the kiss was over – the architect rushed back to the palace and finished the triumphal arch

And – on the same day – the victorious Tamerlane rode back with his Army and Trophies of War – and his cages full of captive kings.

Tamerlane was impressed with the magnificent palace – especially the grand victory arch – and he lavishly rewarded the architect.

But – when Tamerlane went to congratulate his wife – Tamerlane’s wife turned away from him – because no woman returns to the harem after she has tasted vodka.

And – what happened to Tamerlane’s wife and the architect – well that’s another story…!!!

Part 2 – Food for the Body

SEXY DISH

Sexy Eggs (recipe)

Now – Dear Reader – here is the scrumptious mouth-watering Recipe – which embodies the essence of the story:

The recipe for SEXY EGGS 

Now – let’s talk of eggs.

In the story – we had boiled eggs which looked different – but tasted the same.

Now – I am going to tell you how to make boiled eggs that look the same – but taste different (just like the water and the vodka in the Vodka/Water story).

And talking of Vodka and Eggs – apart from Vodka – this snack goes very well with Rum-Pani, Whiskey-Soda and Chilled Beer.

You can take my word for it – for in the good old days – when I loved to drink – this was my favourite “cocktail snack” – which I prepared myself – when I called people over – and this “cocktail snack”  was highly appreciated – by the way – we called “cocktail snacks” as “Small Eats” in the Navy

(Sadly – I am teetotaller now)

Hard-boil as many eggs as you want [at least two per person]

When boiled – plunge the eggs into cold running water to cool rapidly – and shell smoothly.

Carefully and very delicately cut each egg lengthwise into two halves.

Remove the yolks carefully.

Mash the yolks into a paste.

Season the mashed yolks paste with a pinch of salt, pepper and red chilly powder, and keep aside.

Now – comes the interesting part.

Take some Kheema (mince meat) – and boil it in water – along with finely chopped onions – a piece of dalchini (cinnamon) – tejpatta (Bay Leaves) – a few lavangs (cloves) and peppercorns (kali mirch dana) – badi and choti Elaichi (cardamom) – a few cloves of garlic – strips of ginger – one or two fresh green chillies – and a bit of salt.

Cook on slow fire (to facilitate absorbing of the flavour and aroma of the spices) – till the meat is well-cooked, tender and dry.

Now – divide the cooked Kheema mixture into two equal portions.

In one half portion of the Kheema – blend in the mashed yolk paste – and as per your taste – add salt, garam masala, coriander powder, cumin powder, tandoori masala, red chilly powder (depending on how spicy you like it) – and grind in a mixer into a smooth paste.

In a flat bottom pan – heat oil – fry fine onion strips till translucent – add finely chopped tomato – then add the spicy kheema paste – and deep fry till it turns nice and brown – and the oil begins to separate.

Take the other half portion of the Kheema – and fry it the same way with everything else – all the seasoning and spices as the first portion – but without adding the mashed egg yolks. (Yes – Put in all the ingredients mentioned above except the mashed egg yolks).

You now have two non-vegetarian fillings ready – Kheema with Mashed Egg Yolks and Kheema without Mashed Egg Yolks (Both fillings will taste different).

Now use your imagination and prepare a few more non-vegetarian and vegetarian fillings both with and without the mashed egg yolk paste.

Here are some ideas:

Mayonnaise, cooked chopped fish, salt and pepper. 

Mayonnaise, chopped peanuts, salt, chilly powder or mustard paste.

Soft Butter, Cheese, Chilly, Pepper and Salt or so many combinations of spiced up cheese with finely chopped green chillies and tomatoes, mustard paste, and all the sauces you want to blend in.

Let your culinary imagination run wild.

Now carefully stuff in these delicious fillings into the cavities of the eggs in place of the removed yolks – and delicately rejoin – and press together – the two halves – so that it looks like a boiled egg.

Now you can either:

(a) dip these eggs in seasoned besan paste and deep fry into crisp pakoras and enjoy the appetizing snack nice and hot along with your drink

or

(b) just chill the stuffed eggs in your fridge and relish them with tomato sauce or green chutney – or maybe with a yummy lip smacking dip like a tomato dip or a cheese chilly dip or a green dip – which I will tell you about later.

With different fillings inside – each egg will look the same from the outside – but – will taste different when you eat them.

PERCEPTION IS LIKE “A KISS AND A DISH” – IT IS ALL IN THE MIND 

Now – your “Sexy Eggs” are ready to eat.

So – pull out your Rum Pani, Whisky Soda, Chilled Beer – or – why not have some good old Neat Vodka on the Rocks – just like in the story.

Say “Cheers” – and Bash on Regardless…!!!

Then – while enjoying your “Vodka” and Eggs – in your mind – ponder on the story of “Eggs, Vodka and a Kiss”

Well – Dear Reader:

That – in a nutshell – is PERCEPTION

Some things look the same – but taste different

and

Some things look different – but taste the same

Perception is like “a Kiss and a Dish” – it is all in the mind – isn’t it…?

Cheers !!!

I hope you enjoyed the Appetizing Kiss and the Sexy Dish.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/a-kiss-and-dish-story-and-snack.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Revised Version of My Article Written by me Vikram Karve in the year 2000 and earlier posted online my creative writing blog by me Vikram Karve at url: http://creative.sulekha.com/a-story-and-a-recipe-eggs-vodka-and-a-kiss_344028_blog and http://karveeating.blogspot.in/2010/11/eggs-vodka-and-kiss-food-for-thought.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/12/an-appetizing-kiss-with-sexy-dish.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2011/02/sexy-eggs-fiery-vodka-passionate-kiss.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/10/sexy-dish-appetizing-kiss-passionate.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/04/appetizing-kiss-and-sexy-dish-story-and.html etc

Story for My “Girlfriends”

July 18, 2017

A STORY FOR MY “GIRLFRIENDS” 

Humble Plea of a “Young-at-Heart” Navy “Veteran”

A Spoof by By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/a-story-for-my-girlfriends.html

When I joined the Navy as a Sub Lieutenant in the 1970’s – young girls started calling me “uncle”.

I was barely 20 years old – and this was the first time someone had called me “uncle”.

Of course – the girls who called me “uncle” were senior officers’ daughters (members of SODA aka “Senior Officers’ Daughters Association”) – and they were following “fauji” social tradition of addressing all officers as “uncle”.

It did not matter that most of these girls who called me “uncle” were almost my age – or just a few years younger.

After retirement – we live in lovely modern residential society in Pune – where most of the residents are young “IT Nerds” and “Techie Couples” working in the IT/ITES/Software Sector.

Sadly – most of the girls called me “uncle”.

Of course – the “girls” – range from nubile young IT Techies in their 20’s – to beautiful young mothers in their 30’s and 40’s.

Believe it or not – but the other day – a rather “middle aged” woman called me “Kaka” (which colloquially implies a rather “elderly” uncle in Marathi).

A few days ago – a “young” grandmother called me “uncle”

I was devastated.

When I joined the Navy in the 1970’s – girls called me “uncle”.

Now – more than 40 years later – “girls” still call me “uncle”.

To make matters worse – even some of my Facebook and Twitter “Virtual Girlfriends” have started calling me “Uncle” – and – some “Girlfriends” address me as “Sir” too.

Well – I may be old in age.

But – I am still young at heart.

So – all this “Sir” and “Uncle” business makes me feel old – which is a terrible feeling.

I am terrified.

At this rate – soon – some “Girlfriend” may even call me “Grandfather” (or “Ajoba” in Marathi)

Dear “Girlfriends” – Real and Virtual – offline and online – to all of you – I am making a very humble request from the bottom of my heart:

“Please stop calling me “Uncle “Sir” “Kaka” etc – just call me Vikram…”

My Dear “Girlfriends”:

“It is terrible to be made to feel old.

I am sure you will understand my feelings – and – from now on – you will call me “Vikram” .

And – for those “girlfriends” who still want to make me feel old – I have decided that “enough is enough”…”

If you call me “Uncle” – I will call you “Aunty”

If you call me “Sir” – I will call you “Madam”

If you call me “Kaka” – I will call you “Kaku”

(Thankfully – no “Girlfriend” has called me “Grandpa” or “Ajoba” so far)

All this reminds me of this real life story which I had posted online 5 years ago in this blog on Aug 28, 2012.

The Story is called: The Ageless Wonder – The Eternal “Uncle”

I am posting this story – once again – especially for my “girlfriends”…

THE AGELESS WONDER and THE ETERNAL “UNCLE”

Slice of Life Story – Spoof By Vikram Karve

Part 1

CURZON ROAD APARTMENTS NEW DELHI 

Circa 1982

In 1982 – as a newly married couple – we lived in Curzon Road Apartments on Kasturba Gandhi Marg near India Gate in New Delhi.

Me – my wife – and our puppy dog (a small Lhasa Apso Puppy Dog Sherry given to us as a wedding gift) – all three of us lived in our neat cosy one room apartment with a small kitchenette and a lovely balcony high up on the top floor.

One evening – while on her way back home from work – my wife went to the convenience store to buy milk.

The shopkeeper told her that her father had already bought milk a few minutes ago.

My wife was delighted to hear of the unexpected visit of her father – so she rushed to our apartment.

She did not see her father around – so my wife asked me:

“Where is Daddy…?”

“Your Daddy…? He must be in Srinagar…” I said.

“No. Daddy has come here. Someone told me that Daddy has come here…” she said.

“Who told you…?” I asked.

“The shopkeeper…” she said.

“Really…? Let’s go down and ask him…” I said.

So we went down – and – we asked the shopkeeper.

The shopkeeper pointed towards me and said:

“He took the milk. I thought he was your father.”

“He is my husband…” my wife said, pointing at me.

The shopkeeper looked at me – he seemed quite embarassed.

“I am sorry, Sir – but I was really mistaken…” the shopkeeper said apologetically to me.

Then the shopkeeper smiled at my wife and said to her:

“Madam – you look so young – you look just like a schoolgirl – and your husband looks so “mature” – so I thought that your husband was your father.”

It was true.

When we were married – my wife looked very young – just like a schoolgirl.

She was 21 – and I was 25.

And though the shopkeeper hadn’t spelt it out in so many words – I did look a bit older than my 25 years – with my “healthy” built – and my formidable full-set Navy beard.

Unlike the so-called “metrosexual” men of today – I like to be who I am – so I don’t believe in “cosmetic engineering”.

I believe in the “old-mould” idea that a man must look like a man – tough and masculine – and though hygiene and grooming are important – there is no need for a man to be excessively obsessed about his looks.

Of course – whereas having an appropriate dress sense and wearing good quality clothes is a must – there is no need for a man to “deck up”.

That’s why – when the first strand of grey hair appeared on my head when I was in my mid 40’s – I never used hair-dye – nor did I colour my copious beard when it started greying.

Of course – I must say here – that my wife too has a natural look – and she hardly uses any cosmetics – and she has never coloured her hair.

The fact of the matter was that my wife did indeed look much younger than me.

And – I did indeed look a bit “mature” – as the shopkeeper had said.

Period.

So – even in those days – when a pretty young girl called me “uncle” – I did not mind it very much.

Maybe – for pretty young girls – I did indeed look like an “uncle”.

Part 2

30 YEARS LATER

PUNE 

Circa 2012

This happened 5 years ago in Pune (in the year 2012).

My wife was getting off an auto-rickshaw.

The fare was 52 rupees.

My wife gave the auto-rickshaw driver a 50 rupee note – and she was desperately searching in her purse for a 2 rupee coin.

The auto-rickshaw driver said magnanimously to my wife:

“Never mind Ajji – it is okay if you don’t give me the two rupees.”

Now – in Marathi – the word “AJJI” means GRANDMOTHER.

Ha Ha – the middle-aged auto-rickshaw driver was calling my wife a “Granny”

I cannot describe the emotion I felt when I heard this.

She was being called “Granny” 

But – pretty young girls still call me “Uncle”.

40 years ago – in the 1970’s – my “Girlfriends” called me “Uncle”

And – even now – my “Girlfriends” call me “Uncle” 

Am I an “ageless wonder”…?

Disclaimer:

Maybe the auto-rickshaw driver needed an eye checkup.

My “Better Half” certainly does not look like a “Granny”  in fact – she doesn’t even look like an “Aunty”…

My wife still looks very young – maybe not like a schoolgirl like she did in 1982 – but certainly like a “college girl”…

And me…?

Well – as I told you above – I am an “ageless wonder”.

So – at least now – Dear “Girlfriends”: 

Please don’t call me “Uncle” 

Just call me “Vikram”

And – for those “girlfriends” who still want to make me feel old – I have decided that “enough is enough”…”

If you call me “Uncle” – I will call you “Aunty”

If you call me “Sir” – I will call you “Madam”

If you call me “Kaka” – I will call you “Kaku”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. This story isa work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/a-story-for-my-girlfriends.html

This story was written by me Vikram Karve 5 years ago in 2012 and posted by me online earlier at urls http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/08/am-i-ageless-wonder.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/01/the-eternal-uncle.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/05/memories-of-curzon-road-apartments.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/04/ageless-wonder-or-eternal-uncle.html

Are “Love” and “Trust” Mutually Exclusive…?

July 17, 2017

Can you Love someone you don’t Trust…?

Can you Trust someone you don’t Love…?

Read this story…

LOVE and TRUST

Short Story By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/do-you-love-someone-but-not-trust-herhim.html

“Good Morning…” the HR Head says to the Lady Employee.

“Good Morning, Sir…” the Lady Employee says.

“Please be seated.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

“As the HR Head – it is my duty to advise you regarding a few matters – I hope it is okay if I ask you a few personal questions.”

“Yes, Sir – it is okay – please freely ask me whatever you want to.”

“You got divorced 6 months ago.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“But I see that you have not changed your nomination for provident fund, company group insurance etc – the nominee is still your ex-husband.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I suggest you change the nomination…”

“No.”

“No…? You don’t wish to change the nomination…?”

“I do not wish to change the nomination – I want my ex-husband be the nominee for all my financial affairs…”

“But why…?”

“Because I trust him – I totally trust my ex-husband.”

“You trust your ex-husband even after divorcing him – that’s amazing…”

“Of course I fully trust my ex-husband. He did not cheat me. I was the one who cheated him by having an extramarital affair – that was the reason for our divorce…”

“Oh…”

My ex-husband was always faithful to me – it was I who was unfaithful to him…”

“But…”

I have full faith in my ex-husband – in fact – he still manages all my financial affairs – my bank accounts – my stocks and mutual funds – my investments – he pays all my bills – everything – I don’t even know how much money I have in the bank – I do not have a clue as to what my investments are – or what bills I have to pay – my ex-husband does everything – just like it was before – when we were married…”

“Really…?”

“Yes – our bank accounts remain the same – including my salary account – and my ex-husband does all the banking and he operates all my accounts – he does everything – he keeps the passbooks – does the internet banking – I do not even know the login and passwords…”

“What are you saying…? It is unbelievable…”

“Yes – we have a safe deposit locker with all my jewellery – he handles that too…”

“All that was fine when you were married to him – it may have been okay when you were just divorced – but now…?”

“But now…?”

“Well – I understand that you have remarried…”

“That is right – I got remarried 3 months ago – I submitted the marriage declaration along with the marriage certificate…”

“Yes – that is why I have called you – to advise you – that you should now put your new husband’s name as the nominee for your provident fund, insurance etc…”

“Is it a compulsion…? Is it mandatory for me to nominate my new husband…?”

“No – No – you are free to nominate whoever you wish – but normally – it is advisable to nominate your “next-of-kin” – which happens to be your spouse – your new husband – so it is my duty to advise you to nominate him…”

“I do not wish to nominate my new husband…”

“But why…?”

“I don’t trust him…”

“What…? You don’t trust your new husband…? Why…?”

“Because he is a cheat…”

“What are you saying – that your new husband is a cheat…?”

“Yes. Like me – my new husband too is a cheat. I cheated on my ex-husband – he cheated on his ex-wife – we had an extramarital affair – we got caught – our spouses divorced us – and then – we two lovers got married…”

“Oh…”

“Tell me – how can I trust a man who was unfaithful to his wife…?”

“If you don’t trust him – why did you marry him…?”

“Because I love him…”

“It’s amazing – you love your new husband – but you don’t trust him…”

“Yes – I love him – but I don’t trust him.”

“So – you do not wish to change your nomination – you wish that your ex-husband is the nominee for all your financial affairs – your provident fund, insurance, bank accounts etc…”

“Yes – I want my ex-husband to be the nominee – I want my ex-husband to look after all my financial affairs…”

“Okay.”

“Sir – I have one request…”

“Yes – go ahead…”

“I hope our conversation will be kept confidential.”

“Of course – you can rest assured that not a word will go outside this room.”

“Thank you, Sir – may I go now…?”

“Yes – thank you for your time – it was a most enlightening conversation…”

“Enlightening conversation…? Sir – what do you mean by that…?”

“I always thought that love and trust meant the same thing. 

I thought that love implies trust.

But now – after talking to you – I have realized that love and trust are not connected with each other.  

You can love someone – but not trust him 

and conversely 

You can trust someone – but not love him…” the HR Head says to the Lady Employee.

“That’s correct, Sir – it is possible for Love and Trust to be mutually exclusive…”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/do-you-love-someone-but-not-trust-herhim.html

Revised Version of My Story LOVE AND TRUST posted online earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve Blog on September 28, 2015 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/09/love-and-trust.html  and revised and reposted later on October 27, 2015 at url:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/10/do-you-trust-your-ex.html and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/01/do-you-trust-your-lover.html

Woman in the “Nightie” – Romantic Memoir from My Wonderful Navy Days

July 17, 2017

When I joined the Navy more than 40 years ago in the 1970’s – I was a puritanical simpleton – a prudish dope – and – this resulted in some rather amusing incidents.

Here is one such delightful story from those early Navy Days…

HAUTE COUTURE “LINGERIE” – THE “NIGHTIE” 

Romantic Memories of my Wonderful Navy Days

A Fictional Spoof By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-chic-woman-in-haute-couture-lingerie.html

MY SHIPMATE’S GLAMOROUS WIFE

I was – and maybe I still am – an old fashioned prude – and – I am a bit puritanical by nature.

Let me tell you a hilarious anecdote – a result of my rather prudish behaviour – which happened long back when I was in the Navy.

It was the evening of the “Navy Ball” – the much awaited grand finale of the Navy Week in Mumbai (then called Bombay).

It was decided that all ship’s officers who did not live in the Navy Township (NOFRA) would assemble with our wives in the home of a shipmate who lived in NOFRA near the Navy Command Officers Mess – the venue of the Navy Ball.

We could park our scooters/motorcycles near his house.

(Yes – those days most Navy officers had scooters/motorcycles – and could not afford cars)

We would then all walk down to the Command Mess Lawns for the Navy Ball.

Accordingly – my wife and I reached my shipmate’s house half an hour before the commencement of the Navy Ball.

Some officers and wives were already there – some trickled in – and our shipmate had generously opened a bottle of rum – and told us to help ourselves while they got dressed.

My shipmate came out of his bedroom smartly dressed in the distinctive Navy Uniform Dress No. 6 – “Monkey Jacket” – Bow Tie – Miniature Medals – Cummerbund – and all.

He said that his wife was getting ready.

It was almost time for the Navy Ball.

We were anxiously waiting for his wife to get ready.

After some time the bedroom door opened – and my shipmate’s wife stepped out.

I was most disappointed to see that she had still not got ready.

“What is this – Ma’am…? The Navy Ball is about to start and you are still in your underwear…?” I blurted out.

“Underwear…? my shipmate’s wife said – looking at me with an expression of total shock.

I realized my mistake – so I said to her:

“Sorry – I meant to say “Lingerie. We are getting late and you are still in your lingerie”…”

“Lingerie”…? she gasped in astonishment – it seemed as if she was even more stunned.

Maybe – I had used the wrong word again – so I corrected myself – and I said to her:

“Actually – I meant to say “Nightie”…

When she heard the word “Nightie” – I could see her shock turn into anger.

She was looking at me with blazing eyes.

She pointed towards the skimpy dress she was wearing – and she shouted at me:

“You are calling this a “Nightie”…? This is a haute couture designer dress. Do you know how much money I spent on this exclusive custom-made dress…? 

“Haute Couture…?” I mumbled.

I had never heard the term “haute couture” before.

I looked at my shipmate’s wife with regret in my eyes – and – I put on a contrite expression on my face.

She was looking at me in a strange sort of way – as if thinking something in her mind.

After some time – I saw the expression on her face change from anger into anxiety.

And soon – the expression on the face of my shipmate’s wife changed drastically – from anxiety – her expression changed into one of panic.

My shipmate’s wife looked at my wife – then – she looked at the other ladies – and my shipmate’s wife said in panic:

“Tell me – is this dress really looking so bad…?”

After that – my shipmate’s wife burst into tears – and she ran back into her bedroom.

The fact of the matter was that my shipmate’s wife was very chic, stylish and fashionable.

She had got this most fashionable skimpy western style dress exclusively “made-to-order” from a top designer (“haute couture”) especially for the Navy Ball.

Being an old-fashioned simpleton prude – I thought my shipmate’s wife was wearing a “Nightie”.

I did not realize that it was not a “nightie” that she was wearing – but an exclusive haute couture latest fashion skimpy dress – which she had got specially made for her by a leading fashion designer.

My wife gave me a glaring look and she told me to disappear – lest I say or do something even more stupid – that would further aggravate matters.

Then – my wife and the other ladies went inside to console my shipmate’s wife.

It was decided that all the gentlemen would proceed for the Navy Ball – and – the ladies would join later.

I apologized to my shipmate:

“I am very sorry – I did not mean to insult your wife.”

“Oh, come on – forget it…” my shipmate said, “In fact – after hearing your comments – I almost burst out laughing myself.”

“But your wife must be angry with me…?” I said.

“Don’t worry – she’ll be okay – she spent a fortune on that designer dress – that is why she is so upset…” he said.

Later – the ladies joined us in the Navy Ball.

My shipmate’s wife was the centre of attraction in her “haute couture” skimpy fashionable dress.

Indeed – she looked very sexy in her alluring dress.

I wanted to apologize to her for my earlier “faux pas for calling her lovely “haute couture” dress a “nightie”.

I wanted to tell my shipmate’s wife that she looked very sexy in her exquisite new dress.

But – my wife had given me strict instructions to keep my mouth shut.

So – I kept my mouth shut – and – I did not compliment my shipmate’s wife on how chic and glamorous she was looking in her gorgeous “haute couture” dress.

EPILOGUE

Many years later – my wife was shopping in the Ladies’ Garments Section of a famous Mall in Pune.

I was just hanging around.

Suddenly – I saw the same chic and fashionable lady – my ex-shipmate’s glamorous “haute couture” wife – standing near me.

Yes – it was the same lady who had worn the “haute couture” skimpy fashionable dress to the Navy Ball (which I thought was a “Nightie” and had even called “Lingerie”)

She looked as fashionable and tip-top as ever.

She recognised me.

I wished her.

She smiled back.

“My wife is in the trial room…” I said.

“Oh…? I must meet her…” she said.

I looked at elegant “haute couture” lady – and I said to her:

“Ma’am – I want to ask you a favour…”

“Sure…” she said.

I pointed to the colourful “nighties” hanging nearby on a rack – and I said to her:

“Ma’am – if you don’t mind – can you please help me select a “Nightie” for my wife – she likes “half nighties” – short “nighties” – like these “nighties” over here on this rack…”

My ex-shipmate’s stylish “haute couture” wife burst out laughing – and she said to me:

These are not short “Nighties” – these are “Kurties”  or “Tops – but – they are certainly not “Nighties” – and – by the way – these are not “Lingerie either – Ha Ha – so many years have passed – but you are still as clueless as ever – aren’t you…?”

I smiled at her.

She started laughing.

I joined her in her laughter.

I knew that she had forgiven me for my “faux pas on that Navy Ball Evening – many years ago.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All Stories in this Blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-chic-woman-in-haute-couture-lingerie.html

Updated Re-Post of my Story titled FAUX PAS First Posted by me Vikram Karve in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog in April 2014 at 4/26/2014 08:09:00 PM at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/04/faux-pas-hilarious-memories-of-my.html and in Nov 2014 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/11/my-shipmates-chic-wife-hilarious.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/06/humor-in-uniform-chic-haute-couture.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/01/nightie.html  andhttp://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/poodlefaking-haute-couture-navy-wife.html and https://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/11/haute-couture-lingerie-nightie.html etc

“Made For Each Other” Couple

July 17, 2017

“MADE FOR EACH OTHER” COUPLE

A Love Story By Vikram Karve 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-made-for-each-other-couple.html

Her name was Riya.

His name was Rohan.

They – Riya and Rohan – they were a “made-for-each-other” couple.

I am not saying this just because they won the “made-for-each-other couple contest”.

Yes – we had a “made-for-each-other” couple contest during the Annual Day Celebrations in our Residential Society – a cosmopolitan gated community.

All couples had to participate – and – Riya and Rohan had easily won the contest.

It was a simple contest.

First – all couples had to walk on the ramp – like a fashion show.

10 couples were selected from this round for the “Question-Answer” round.

These 10 couples were asked 10 questions each – the usual “guessing game” stuff about how well they knew each other – about likes/dislikes, events/dates, etc. – including one “intimate” question.

Riya and Rohan had won the “made-for-each-other couple contest” – and most deservingly so.

Yes – Riya and Rohan were easily the best-looking couple on the ramp.

And – Riya and Rohan were the only couple who had each answered all questions correctly.

After Riya and Rohan won the “made-for-each-other couple contest” – I began to observe them a bit more closely – and – I saw that – in real life too – Riya and Rohan were truly a “made-for-each-other” couple.

I have never seen a couple so devoted to each other and in perfect harmony with each other.

Riya and Rohan were perfectly compatible with each other – in all aspects – and – I felt jealous of them.

One evening – after my evening walk – I stopped by at my favorite café – for a cup my customary “post-walk” cup of tea.

I saw Riya and Rohan seated at a table.

They greeted me – and – they asked me to join them.

“Are you sure you want me to join you…?” I said, “I don’t want to be a “Kabab-Me-Haddi” and spoil your “lovey-dovey” quality time…”

“Oh, come on, Uncle…” Riya said, “We two have been together for 10 years now…”

“You two still look like honeymooners – so much in love with each other…” I said.

“Thank you, Uncle…” Riya said.

Their snacks arrived.

Rohan and Riya insisted that I eat with them.

As I saw Riya eating – I suddenly remembered that it was “Karva Chauth” – so – I said to Riya:

“Hey – today is “Karwa Chauth” – you are supposed to “fast” – isn’t it…?”

“Why…?” she asked me.

“Well – all married women fast from sunrise to moonrise for the safety, well-being, prosperity and longevity of their husbands – didn’t you know…?”

“Of course I know about “Karwa Chauth”…” Riya said.

“In fact – there is a “women-only” ceremony on our society rooftop terrace – all married women are attending – in fact – the function must have already started – didn’t you get the circular…?” I asked her.

“I saw the circular…” Riya said.

“Then why aren’t you attending the celebration – all married women are attending – even my wife was getting all decked-up to go there…” I said.

“I am not married …” Riya said, “the function is for “married women” – but – I am not married…”

I was dumbstruck.

Seeing the bewilderment on my face – Rohan said:

“Uncle – we – Riya and Me – we are not married – we are just living together…”

“Living together…? For 10 years…?” I asked.

“Yes…” Riya said.

“Haven’t you thought of taking your relationship to the next level…?”

“Next level…? What do you mean by “taking a relationship to the “next level”…?”

“By “next level” – I mean “marriage”. Haven’t you thought of getting married to each other – to convert your “live-in relationship” into a marriage…?”

“What’s the point…? We are very happy in our present relationship – it’s truly wonderful. And, Uncle – you tell me – the very fact that we won the “made-for-each-other couple contest” bears testimony to our “perfect” relationship” – isn’t it…?”

“Yes…” I said, “You two are the best “made for each other” couple I have ever seen – I have never ever seen a couple so perfectly in harmony with each other like you two – perfectly matched and totally devoted to each other.

“Yes, Uncle – we have a beautiful relationship – exquisite and full of joy. Our “live-in” arrangement is working so marvelously for 10 long years – so – why tinker with something that is working so well…? Why should we ruin our beautiful relationship by taking it to the “next level” – as you put it…? Why try to fix something that ain’t broke…?”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-made-for-each-other-couple.html

A Murder Mystery – Zan, Zar, Zameen

July 16, 2017

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/motive-for-murder-zan-zar-zameen.html

MOTIVE FOR MURDER – ZAN ZAR ZAMEEN

Crime Fiction – A Murder Mystery – Story By Vikram Karve

There is a saying in Urdu:

 Har qatl di e jar zan zar zameen

The Motive for every Murder is because of Woman, Money or Land

Think about it.

Zan (love for a woman)

Zar (greed for money)

Zameen (dispute over land and property)

ZanZarZameen – one or more of these are the root causes behind murder – aren’t they…?

In this murder mystery story – what is the motive for murder…?

Is it Zan…?

Or is it Zar…

Or is it Zameen…

Read on and discover for yourself…

MOTIVE FOR MURDER – ZAN ZAR ZAMEEN : a story by Vikram Karve 

“A man dies in suspicious circumstances. You arrest another man for his murder. Then – the “murder-suspect” dies in the lock-up. And then – you close the case…” Rita says.

“That’s what happened…” I say.

“Well, the higher-ups are not happy with your closure report…” she says matter-of-factly, “they feel you should have delved more deeply – and you should have investigated the case a bit more thoroughly.”

“It is an open and shut case. What is there left to investigate…? And Rita – you were there yourself when all this happened…” I say.

“I know. But the guys who died were top officers – influential men. The powers-that-be are concerned. The boss wants me to go over the case once more with you before he approves the closure report…” Rita says.

I say nothing – I remain silent.

Rita says:

“Sir – I know I am one batch junior to you – and – I know that you have independent charge – so if you feel that I am interfering…”

“No. No. It’s not that…” I say hurriedly, “it’s okay. I have no problem. After all – you are Head of the Crime Branch in Headquarters.”

“And – I am tipped to take over from you over here…” Rita says.

“You…? You’re going to take over from me…? Where am I going…?” I ask, surprised.

“Don’t you know…? Well – I am not supposed to tell you – but once all this is over – it is most likely that you are heading for a coveted foreign assignment…” Rita says.

“I’m going abroad…?” I ask.

“That’s what the boss told me – in strictest confidence…” Rita says, “he told me to discuss the case with you and satisfy myself – and the moment I submitted my report – he would close this pending case and relieve you – so that you can hand over your duties to me – and you fly off across the seas…”

“Thanks for the good news. Let’s get this over with fast. Tell me – how should we go about it…?” I say.

“Sir – just tell me what happened. I’ll take your word for it…” Rita says.

“The murder happened on Barren Island. As the name indicates – it is indeed a  desolate uninhabited island. There’s nothing over there – except the volcano – that’s what these guys had ostensibly come to see. There is the barren island, the volcano, the springs, the lovely beach and the site office-cum-guesthouse which we activate for such VIP visits – bloody work-cum-pleasure trips – having a good time under the pretext of work…”

“Your report says that there were only six people on Barren Island on that fateful night…” Rita says.

“That’s right – you know it.  Joshi – the Chief Scientist who was murdered – he was in Room No. 1 – and his deputy Sharma – the murderer – he was next door in Room No. 2. You – the Liaison Officer – you were in Room No. 3. The Technocrat Couple – Mr. and Mrs. Krishnan – they were in Room No. 4. And Me – the Camp In-Charge – was in Room No. 5 – that’s all…” I say.

“No one else…? Guest House Staff…? Cooks…? Security staff…? Boat crew…?” Rita asks.

“I sent them back to Port Blair and told them to come in the morning. We wanted some privacy – a cosy party all by ourselves on the beach. Besides – I wanted the staff to enjoy their New Year’s Eve with their families. Come on, Rita – you know all that. You were there yourself…”

“Just checking…” she says, “and when did you all turn in…?”

“Well – the Krishnan’s were the first to go to bed – immediately after midnight – they were quite drunk – both of them. And then you left – saying that you were tired and wanted to get up early in the morning…” I say.

“And then…?” Rita asks.

“We drank for an hour or so – and I was feeling quite high – so I came back to the guest house and went to sleep – but the two scientists Joshi and Sharma kept on drinking. In fact – when I asked them to come with me – I remember them saying that they wanted to lie down on the beach and drink until sunrise…”

“And next morning – Joshi’s body is found floating in the sea…?” Rita asks.

“Yes. The body had strangulation marks around the neck…” I say.

“So – you carry out an investigation – and you arrest Sharma on charges of murder…?” Rita asks.

“I had a post mortem done in Port Blair. The time of death was around 3 AM…” I say.

“So…?” Rita asks.

“You – Rita – you were in your room – the Krishnan’s were in their room – I was in my room – only Sharma remained with Joshi on the beach. Sharma had no “alibi”. Among all of us – Sharma was the only one without an “alibi” – so I arrested him as the prime suspect for the murder of Joshi…” I say.

“Did you ask Sharma where he was…? Did you try and interrogate him…? Did you try and get a confession…?” Rita asks.

“Sharma just kept mum like a zombie. He did not answer anything – he refused to give a statement. That’s why I …”

“That’s why you gave him Sodium Pentothal…? Sir – you know you cannot do this on your own – you have to take the court’s permission…” Rita says.

“A wee bit of truth serum never hurt anyone…” I say.

“But he died…!” Rita says.

“I didn’t know Sharma would react this way. I thought he was a tough cookie. I had watched him trek, swim, climb the steep slope of the volcano. You should have seen the way he was drinking and eating at the party…” I say, “and I wanted to get to the bottom of this case – I wanted to find out the motive behind the murder.”

“Motive…? Your Zan Zar Zameen theory, Sir…?” Rita asks with a grimace on her face.

“It was a case of Zan – a woman…” I say.

Zan…?” Rita says, looking quite astonished.

“Yes. I got a lead. Don’t ask me how…” I say.

“It must be your batch-mate – in Delhi…” Rita asks.

“Maybe. But that is not important. What is important is that Joshi was Sharma’s direct boss – and that Sharma was having a affair with Joshi’s wife.”

“So – Sharma murdered him…? But why…?” Rita asks.

“That’s what I was trying to find out with a bit of truth serum – but the bugger collapsed and died…” I say.

“Well I don’t know about the motive – but I can say with surety that Sharma did not kill Joshi…” Rita says.

“Then – who murdered Joshi…?” I ask her.

“I don’t know…” Rita says, “but you said that you arrested Sharma because he was the only one without an alibi. But actually – Sharma had a “cast iron alibi”…”

“What…? Sharma had an “alibi”…?” I ask.

“Let’s go through it once again…” Rita says looking into my eyes, “the Krishnan’s leave the party just after midnight – then I leave shortly afterwards – I remember the exact time – I clearly remember looking at my watch and the wall clock – I reached my room at 12:30. Tell me – do you remember the exact time you left the beach and returned to your room?”

“I told you I was quite high – and I don’t remember exactly. We drank for an hour or so. So maybe I came back to my room at around 1 o’clock – or maybe 1:30 – but I came back – and Sharma and Joshi remained at the beach and kept drinking…” I say.

“You are wrong. Sharma came back at 1 o’clock – not you…” Rita says

“What…?” I say.

“I told you that Sharma had a “cast iron alibi”. Sharma came to my room at 1 o’clock. Sharma was with me in my room the whole night…” Rita says.

“Sharma was with you in your room the whole night…? Doing what…? What the hell was Sharma doing in your room all night…?” I ask.

Rita looks at me – and she says to me:

“Sharma was making love to me – yes – he was in bed with me – making love to me. We slept together the whole night – and then – he went to his room at 5 in the morning – just as the sun was rising – before everyone got up. And it was much later – that the boat ferrying the staff came at 6 o’clock – and they discovered Joshi’s dead body floating in the sea…”

“It is very confusing – after this new twist…” I say.

“You said that the post-mortem report says the time of death was 3 AM – and you arrested Sharma because he had no alibi – he could not tell you where he was at 3 AM…?” Rita asks.

“Yes…” I say.

Rita says to me:

“But I told you – that Sharma was with me at 3 AM – he was with me from 1 AM to 5 AM – so Sharma had a cast iron alibi – in fact – everyone had an alibi – except…”

“Except…?” I utter involuntarily.

Rita looks at me – and she says to me:

“Do you understand what I am saying…?”

“Are you implying that I murdered Joshi…?” I say, my heartbeat rising.

Rita does not say anything – but she looks at me with a strange expression – a look of scorn combined with pity.

I look at Rita – and I say to her:

“But tell me Rita – why should I murder Joshi…? What is my motive…?”

Rita looks at me – directly into my eyes – and she says to me:

“Your motive for committing murder…? Well – I really do not know. You will have to ask yourself – is it Zan or Zar or Zameen? But whatever it is – now the onus is on you to prove your innocence – because now – you are the prime suspect for the murder…”

VIKRAM KARVE

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Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story is a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/07/motive-for-murder-zan-zar-zameen.html

This Story ZAN ZAR ZAMEEN was written by me Vikram Karve more than 5 years ago in June 2012 and First Posted Online by me on July 4, 2012 at 7/04/2012 12:55:00 AM in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/07/zan-zar-zameen.html  and re-posted online a number of times by me including at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/08/motive-for-murder-zan-zar-zameen.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/12/crime-fiction-murder-mystery-motive-for.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/06/zan-zar-zameen-whodunit-murder-mystery.html and https://karvediat.blogspot.in/2012/08/motive-for-murder-zan-zar-zameen-women.html  etc

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