Electrophoresis – Sci Fi Fiction

January 17, 2017

Link to my original post HIGH-TECH “WIFE SWAPPING” in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/high-tech-wife-swapping.html

Short Fiction Story – A Sci Fi Romance  By Vikram Karve

From my Creative Writing Archives:

Science Fiction – Sci Fi – an experimental story.

I wrote this story long ago – more than 20 years ago – in the mid 1990s. This story also features in my short fiction anthology COCKTAIL 

Do let me know whether you liked the story.

HIGH-TECH “WIFE SWAPPING” – A Romance By VIKRAM KARVE

Failures avoid school reunions.

It is painful, and shameful, for a loser to be in midst of winners.

But this time I decided to go.

Sucheta would be there.

She had rung up from New York.

And of course her husband Anand was also coming with her.

Maybe that was the real reason I wanted to go.

It was fifteen years since we passed out from school and the reunion was a grand affair in the best hotel at this picturesque ‘queen’ of hill stations on the slopes of the awesome mighty Himalayas where our school was located.

As I said the reunion was followed a lavish dinner and dance party for ours was an elite and famous boarding school, valued more for its snob appeal rather than for its academic excellence.

‘Bookworm’ was an exception.

He had topped the board exams and had become a distinguished scientist, always inventing something mysterious and experimenting something esoteric.

“Hi, Bookworm,” I said. I was genuinely happy to see him.

“Moushumi,” he said angrily, “my name is not bookworm. My name is Doctor Kedarnath Joshi.  So don’t call me Bookworm. I don’t like it. I am a full-fledged Professor.”

“Okay, I’ll call you Professor Bookworm,” I teased him.

“That’s better,” he said, with smug look on his face.

“So, Professor, what are you inventing nowadays?” I asked.

“I’m researching in the frontiers of Psycho-cybernetics.”

“Pyscho-what…? Stop the mumbo jumbo, Bookworm. Tell me in simple language. Who are you and what do you do?”

“Okay. I am a neurologist. A psychiatrist.  A psychologist. And I also hold a doctorate in Electrical Engineering. Currently I am researching in mind-transference,” Bookworm said proudly.

“Mind-transference…?” I asked confused.

“You have seen star-trek haven’t you?”

“Yes.”

“There they transfer persons in space. H G Wells’ time machine transferred entire persons in time,” he said.

“Time Machine…you’re making a time machine…?” I asked incredulously.

“No..No… I am working on something more complicated…Brain Transfer…I can put your mind into someone else’s body and vice-versa – that is, someone else’s brain into your body!”

“It sounds very spooky to me.  Is it ESP…?  Or some kind of occult stuff…?”

“Not at all,” Bookworm said, “Nothing supernatural, esoteric or mystical.  It’s a purely scientific technique.  I’ve developed a pilot system for trials. The machine is upstairs in my hotel room.  Why don’t you give it a try?”

A strange curious wicked thought crossed my mind. I surveyed the expanse of the majestic ballroom with my eyes and soon my eyes found Anand.

His dashing physique and his magnificent beard made him look prominent in the crowd.

He looked a decisive, hot-blooded and dangerous man, but he also looked vulnerable.

He wore a lonely and rather perplexed expression, as though he were at the party but not enjoying it.

And beside him stood his wife Sucheta radiating the natural pride of possession that any woman feels when she has the ownership and company of a man that other women desire.

I reminisced. There were four of us who grew up together. The same group of classmates and friends – in school and in college – Anand, Mohan, Sucheta and Moushumi (that’s me) – the famous four – inseparable friends. All of us loved each other.

I had the first choice since both Anand and Mohan were desperately in love with me and both had proposed to me.

I chose Mohan, leaving Anand for Sucheta.

And since that moment I kept tormenting myself wondering if I had made the wrong choice.

Physically I lived with Mohan but longed for Anand, repenting, and trying to imagine what my life would have been like if I had married Anand instead of Mohan.

I looked at Anand, and then at Bookworm.

Serendipity…! Yes. It was indeed Serendipity… pure luck…

I felt the adrenalin rush.

This was my golden chance to find out what life would have been like if I had married Anand… and I was going to seize the opportunity.

I waved out to Sucheta and five minutes later both of us were lying side by side on the double-bed in Bookworm’s hotel room.

There was a mesh of wires with electrode-transducers connected to our heads (like an EEG), a laptop-like special computer and a briefcase-size electronic device which Bookworm described as the ‘Electrophoresis Signal Processor’.

“Good,” Bookworm said, “both your brainwave frequencies are in ‘beta’ state around 15 hertz.  I’ll give you both a high frequency burst to momentarily raise your brain-states to ‘K-Complex’ and instantaneously commence the electrophoresis.”

Looking at me, he said, “Moushumi, you will be Sucheta as far as the outside world is concerned. So when you wake up, go straight to Anand.  Let’s see if he suspects.” And then to Sucheta he said, “Sucheta, you go straight to Mohan. He will think you are Moushumi.”

“It’s dangerous. I’m scared,” Sucheta said.

“Come on, Sucheta. Be a sport. It’s just for fun,” I said.

“It’s not fun. We’re doing this experiment to validate my research – in vivo – to see if the concept of mind-transference it works. Just for half-an-hour,” Bookworm said, “then both of you come back and I’ll reverse the process, everything will be the same as before, and you can leave as your own total selves – your same mind in your own same body.”

I closed my eyes in trepidation wondering whether I was doing the right thing. Suddenly I felt my brain go blank and then there were vivid flashes in a void.

Half an hour later, when I was in a state of ecstasy, in seventh heaven, gliding in Anand’s strong arms, enjoying the dance, in blissful trance.

Bookworm suddenly appeared by my side, started tugging my arm and telling me with urgency in his voice, “It’s time. Let’s go, Moushumi.”

“Moushumi…? Why are you calling her Moushumi…?” an incredulous Anand asked Bookworm.

“She is Moushumi,” Bookworm said pointing at me.

“Are you drunk or stoned or something…?” Anand snapped angrily. “Can’t you see she’s Sucheta, my wife…? Moushumi must be with her husband Mohan.  I last saw them having a drink near the bar.”

Instinctively I turned and looked towards the bar.

I could not spot Sucheta.

Nor was Mohan there.

I hurriedly scanned the room.

There was no sign of them.

They had disappeared.

Bookworm was in a state of panic and he started shouting incoherently:

“Anand…Anand…Try to understand…Your wife Sucheta has gone away with Mohan.  And this lady here in front of you is Moushumi – Mohan’s wife. This is only Sucheta’s body. Inside her is Moushumi’s brain. Moushumi’s mind is in Sucheta’s body. My in vivo experiment was successful – my psycho-cybernetics discovery is validated – the mind-transference has been achieved…!”

“Psychocybernetics …? Mind-transference …? Stop talking nonsense …!” Anand shouted angrily at Bookworm and taking my arm he said to me, “Come on Sucheta. Let’s go. Bookworm has gone crazy. And it’s getting late. We’ll drive straight down to Delhi. I’ve got a busy day tomorrow before we catch our flight back home to New York.”

As we walked through the parking lot towards the luxury limousine Anand had hired for his visit I noticed that ‘our’ car was missing.

It was cold and I glanced at ‘our’ small cottage on the hill slope for the last time.

‘They’ were probably cuddling up in ‘our’ bedroom by now.

I thought I was smart, but it was Sucheta who played the double game.

For me it was only a half-hour experiment, but Sucheta had upped the ante and turned the tables on me.

Will Mohan ever find out?

And what about Anand?

Will he continue to think I am his wife Sucheta?

Will this psycho-cybernetic mind-transference last forever? Am I beyond the point of no return?

As I think of my future, I shiver with tremors of trepidation.

From now on life is going to be a tightrope walk.

Every moment I’ll have to be on my toes.

I’m excited…very excited…and a bit terrified and scared too.

It’s going to be dangerous fun.

But one thing is sure.

Now I will really know what life would have been like if had I married Anand instead of Mohan.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post HIGH-TECH “WIFE SWAPPING” in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/high-tech-wife-swapping.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved. 

Updated Version of my Story written by memore than 20 years ago – in the mid 1990s – and earlier Posted Online by me a number of times in my various blogs including at urls: http://creative.sulekha.com/double-game-fiction-short-story-by-vikram-karve_32021_blog  and  https://karve.wordpress.com/2005/12/24/  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/02/electrophoresis-virtual-wife-swapping.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/09/wife-swapping.html andhttp://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/01/wife-swapping-by-signal-processing.html  etc

 

Vikram Karve shared a post on Quora with you

January 14, 2017

My @Quora post: WHY DOES ONLY THE ARMY OFFICER NEED A SAHAYAK (BATMAN)?
“SAHAYAK” aka “BATMAN” aka “ORDERLY” aka “R… https://www.quora.com/profile/Vikram-Karve/Writing-by-VIKRAM-KARVE/WHY-DOES-ONLY-THE-ARMY-OFFICER-NEED-A-SAHAYAK-BATMAN?srid=5Hkq&share=7a93e7d8

Inspirational Wisdom from Swami Vivekananda

January 12, 2017

HOW TO BE HAPPY 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/inspirational-teachings-of-swami.html

INSPIRATIONAL WISDOM FROM SWAMI VIVEKANANDA
By
VIKRAM KARVE

Today, January 12, is the birth anniversary of Swami Vivekananda (12 January 1863 – 4 July 1902).

I first learnt about Swami Vivekananda, sometime in the 1960’s, when I was a small boy, and my father had taken us to visit Belur Math near Kolkata.

At Belur Math I acquired a tiny pocket book called “Thus Spake Vivekananda”.

Whenever the chips were down, or I felt dejected, I referred to the inspiring gems of wisdom, distilled from the complete works of Swami Vivekananda, for instant motivation and strength.

On the occasion of his birth anniversary, let me tell you about my favourite saying of Swami Vivekananda which inspired me and I try to implement in my day to day living.

AN INSPIRATIONAL GEM OF WISDOM FROM SWAMI VIVEKANANDA

Here is an inspirational gem of wisdom, a phrase from the sayings of Swami Vivekananda:

Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison

I feel that the word “weak” is all encompassing.

The term “weak” embraces anything that creates in you a stressful situation.

Thus “weakness” includes all negative emotions and feelings like anger, irritation, fury, worry, anxiety, frustration, despondency, depression, demoralization etc, which, in a nutshell, cause unhappiness.

These negative emotions disturb your inner tranquility and equanimity, drain you emotionally and intellectually, and make you feel “weak” just like physical weakness.

UNHAPPINESS IS WEAKNESS

Unhappiness is a negative emotion which drains you.

Hence, Unhappiness is Weakness.

Unhappiness is Poison for the soul.

Conversely, Happiness is Strength.

Happiness is Tonic for the soul.

Now, how do you “reject as poison” the “weakness” of unhappiness?

The first step is to identify your “Unhappiness Creators”.

IDENTIFY YOUR UNHAPPINESS CREATORS

Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place, close your eyes, introspect, and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative,

Reflect and introspect on all your unhappiness-creators and unhappy situations.

Now sit down in a quiet tranquil place, close your eyes, introspect, and try to think of all the things that make you feel negative,

Reflect and introspect on all your unhappiness-creators and unhappy situations.

These unhappiness creators can be anything – tangible and intangible – things, activities, persons etc.

Unhappiness Creators include:

  1. Toxic individuals andincompatible persons, who irritate, annoy and hassle you
  1. Foodsand Beverages(like Alcohol) which do not suit you and are physically detrimental to your health and well-being
  1. Activities, social and personal, which may appear pleasurable, but which actually drain you out
  1. Technology and Gadgets, like your cell-phone, which disturb your peace of mind
  1. Strained Relationships, which are a source of unhappiness and cause stress in you
  1. Any activity or thing that causes a guilty consciencewithin you
  1. Disagreeable personsand unpleasant activitieswhich are a stimulus for negative emotions like anger, worry, fear, etc and create negative vibes within you.

Close your eyes, introspect and think about all aspects of your life – your work life, your home life, your social life.

Think about all the persons, activities and things that generate negative vibes, create stress and unhappiness in you, things that make you feel “weak”.

Then, follow Swami Vivekananda’s advice:

Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison

Yes, you can do it in actual life.

Just “reject” all these “poisonous” things and people by avoiding them as far as possible.

Make an exhaustive list of all your “unhappiness creators”  all the things and people that make you “weak” – and try to reject them as “poison”. 

At first you may be a bit skeptical about this approach.

But when you start implementing, you will be surprised how much of it is in your own control to prevent unhappiness.

SAY NO TO UNHAPPINESS CREATORS and WELCOME HAPPINESS CREATORS

While, on the one hand:

  1. You reject the things that make you “weak”and unhappy

simultaneously, on the other hand:

  1. You must reinforce the things that make you feel “strong”and happy

 

Say NO to unhappiness creators

Say YES to happiness creators  

Yes  if unhappiness is weakness” – then  happiness is strength.

So simultaneously, reflect and contemplate.

Make a list of things and persons that give you strength and joy and make you happy and productive.

Include all the things and people that create positive feelings in you.

Then try to devote as much time and energy to doing these positive things and interacting with these morale boosting people that give you strength and make you feel good and happy.

MANTRA FOR HAPPINESS (and UNHAPPINESS) – IN A NUTSHELL

To put it in a nutshell, if you want to be happy:

  1. Try your best to generate happiness vibesby doing things which make you “strong” and happy
  1. Try to reduce or even eliminate negative unhappiness vibesby “rejecting”things which make you “weak” and unhappy.

(And if you want to be unhappy, just do the opposite – keep wallowing in negative vibes by encouraging your unhappiness creators and avoiding your happiness creators).

HOW TO CREATE HAPPINESS and HOW TO CREATE UNHAPPINESS

Whenever I feel unhappy, I realize that it is because I have allowed myself to be overwhelmed by my unhappiness creators.

And the moment I envelop myself with my happiness creators, I start feeling happy.

Remember this saying of Swami Vivekananda:

Anything that makes you weak physically, intellectually, and spiritually, reject as poison

(Conversely, I say: Anything that makes you feel strong, imbibe as nectar)

Implementing this inspiring gem of wisdom from Swami Vivekananda is breathtaking in its simplicity.

Try it – experiment – discover your happiness creators and unhappiness creators.

Start making your two lists and then you know what to do.

This works for me and I am sure it will work for you.

I do feel stressed out and unhappy at times – but I know why – and I know what to do – so I try my best to make my unhappiness creators disappear and overwhelm myself with happiness creators.

Wish you a stress-free life filled with happiness.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/inspirational-teachings-of-swami.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Updated, Abridged and Revised version of my article written more than 20 years ago and Posted by me Vikram Karve at 9/26/2009 03:50:00 PM in this blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2009/09/stress-management-made-simple.html  and http://creative.sulekha.com/wisdom-from-swami-vivekananda_561671_blog  and   http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/01/inspirational-wisdom-from-swami.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/01/inspirational-tonic-from-swami.html etc

Stop “Counting” – Enjoy Life

January 11, 2017

“COUNTING” KILLS ENJOYMENT – PRECISION DESTROYS PLEASURE 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/qualitative-living.html

A money-conscious friend asked me: “How much money did you spend on your recent New Zealand trip…?”

“I really don’t know the amount of money I spent…” I said, “but I enjoyed my New Zealand trip immensely…”

“Didn’t you calculate the precise amount you spent…? Don’t you keep accounts…?” he asked.

“No – I never keep precise accounts. I generally ensure that I don’t spend beyond my means – so – a rough idea is enough…” I said to him.

One thing I learnt in the Navy is that – if you want to enjoy life – never “count” too much.

“Counting” Kills Enjoyment

Precision destroys Pleasure

If you want to enjoy “Quality of Life” – it is better to live a “Qualitative Life” – rather than a “Quantitative Life”

Here is an article I wrote a few years ago on the topic.

Read on…

QUALITATIVE LIVING 

Experiential Wisdom from a Navy Veteran By Vikram Karve

It was a grand Navy party on our ship.

There was lots of bonhomie and spirits were high.

Booze was flowing freely – and the stewards were offering drink after drink to officers, especially the guests.

“Come on Sir – your glass is empty – here is a drink for you…” the steward said, offering a glass of whisky to a guest officer.

“No – No – I have had 3 pegs already…” the officer said.

“Sir – you have had 5 pegs of Whisky – but who is counting…?” the steward said.

I laughed.

The wizened steward had a point – if you are going to count your drinks – then why drink at all…?

The aim of drinking alcohol is to feel happy – so you must drink till you feel happy.

Why “count” your drinks…?

Happiness depends on your drinking mood – not on the number of drinks you consume.

It is the same with eating good food.

The moment you start counting calories – you lose the enjoyment of food – you keep focusing on calories in a dish – instead of its taste.

At buffets – I have seen “figure conscious” beauties looking wistfully at the lavish spread of delicious food – counting the calories in every dish – and then settling for just a little bit of salad – and even skipping the enticing “calorie laden” desserts.

Later – I am sure they wish they had eaten to their heart’s content.

Why go to a Feast it you want to Count your Calories…?

In this “digital” age – people “count” everything.

Long ago – during my glorious Mumbai days – one Sunday morning – I took a friend on one of my enjoyable Sunday special super-long walks in Mumbai.

Let me give you an idea of the route.

We started early – at dawn – from my house in Empress Court – opposite the Oval near Churchgate – admiring, in the early morning pre-sunrise light, the impressive silhouettes of the magnificent Gothic structures of the High Court and Mumbai University across the Oval – we heard the clock on Rajabai Tower strike 6 – then we walked briskly past Oxford Bookstore, KC College, CCI, Marine Plaza Hotel till Marine Drive.

We crossed the Marine Drive, turned right and started off towards Chowpatty, greeting with a smile the morning joggers and walkers, rinsing my lungs with the fresh invigorating sea breeze, and soon we were past Marine Lines, Taraporewala Aquarium, Charni Road, Chowpatty, Wilson College and at the end of Marine Drive.

Here we turned left up the Walkeshwar Road to Teen Batti – we did not go towards Banganga – but turned right towards Hanging Gardens on Malabar Hill – took a round of garden atop the water tank near Kamala Nehru Park (is it called Phirozeshah Mehta Udyan?) – cantered down to Kemp’s Corner where we turned right – a U-turn really – past Crossword Bookstore – down Hughes Road – left past Gamdevi, Nana Chowk and crossed the railway over-bridge – and we kept going onto Grant Road past Novelty Cinema – turned right at Delhi Durbar on Falkland Road – kept walking till we reached VP Road – walked past Gol Deval, Alankar cinema and there we were at Bhendi Bazar – looking at the inimitable Noor Mohammadi Hotel in front of us across Mohamedali Road – our first “halt” – for rest and replenishment.

Around 3 hours of brisk walking had built up in me a voracious appetite – and I was ready to devour a sumptuous breakfast.

I was hungry – and I eat only when I am hungry.

(Even here – I do not “count” – I do not look at the clock and eat my meals – I do not eat lunch just because it is “lunchtime” – whenever I feel hungry – I eat – I have had my lunch anywhere between 11 and 3).

Coming back to our story – we enteredr the Spartan no-nonsense eatery – and I ordered Nalli Nihari and Roti for both of us.

Within a minute a bowl of piping hot gravy – with a generous chunk of succulent meat floating in it – and a fluffy khaboosh roti was placed in front of me – and one in front of my friend.

I dipped a piece of the soft roti in the spicy rich gravy – let it soak for a while – put it in my mouth – and closed my eyes to luxuriate in and relish the gastronomic experience in its entirety.

I felt the juicy gravy soaked roti melting on my tongue – releasing its delicious flavours and spicy aroma which permeated into my soul.

I was in seventh heaven – savouring the luscious taste of the delicious Nalli Nihari – epicurean pleasure of the highest order – sheer bliss – when I opened my eyes – and I noticed that my friend had not started eating.

“Come on – eat up – or the roti and nihari will get cold…” I said.

“Look at the amount of oil floating in this greasy gravy – there must be so many calories in there…” he said.

“Come on – we have walked so much to build up an appetite…” I said.

“How much did we walk – we walked for nearly 3 hours – so if our walking speed was…?”

I could see he was “calculating” the distance in his mind – so I interrupted him – and I said to him: “How the hell does it matter how much we walked…?”

“I am just trying to calculate whether the calories in this dish are more than the calories we spent walking…”

“Why are you “counting” so much…? You enjoyed the walk – didn’t you…? Now – you enjoy the food…” I said.

It is crazy – the way people “count” while exercising.

The aim of exercise is to make you feel healthy – and more importantly – exercise must make you feel good.

In our school and college days – and later in the Navy – we played team games like football, hockey, basketball, water-polo etc.

No one kept time – no one counted the goals – no one bothered who won or lost – we just enjoyed playing the game.

Later – I used to swim.

As I grew older – I started walking.

I always like to listen to my body while exercising– one day I may exercise more – one day it may be less – I never “count” – it all depends on my mood.

Recently – I came across some crazy “counting” types who put up updates on Social Media (Facebook/Twitter) about the exact distance they have walked

(I believe there is a device that measures the precise distance you have walked – even the number of steps you have walked).

Instead of enjoying the walking experience – these “quantitative” types are obsessed with distance/speed/heart-rate/pulse-rate/calories expended while walking/jogging/exercising.

The aim of exercise is to make you feel good – and all this “counting” ruins the enjoyment of exercise – and – in fact – may even cause stress in you if you do not meet your “targets”.

Exercise should be a pleasure – not a pain.

Yes – the root cause of this “counting” disease is the all-pervasive competitive environment – and everyone’s desire to “set goals” and “meet targets”.

I remember an incident at work.

Our team was working on an intricate design problem and we were nearing the solution – when suddenly the siren sounded for “lunch break”.

“Sir – it is 12:30 – should we break for lunch…” someone said.

“Are you so hungry that you will drop dead if you don’t eat right now…?” I asked him.

“No, Sir…” he said.

“See – we are in the mood now – so let’s finish off what we are doing – if we break off now we will lose our mood and synergy by the time we assemble again after lunch – also we won’t be able to enjoy our lunch because this unresolved problem will still be on our minds – so let’s finish this off first and then we can have a relaxed lunch…” I said.

By the time we finished – it was 1:30 PM – and we were enjoying our lunch – when my boss paid a surprise visit to my office.

Since he was a “clock-watcher” type – he was annoyed that we were having lunch outside the “prescribed lunchtime”.

Next morning – I felt hungry at 11 AM – so I opened up my lunchbox and was enjoying eating my lunch – when my boss made an appearance.

“You are a crazy chap – yesterday – you were eating lunch at 1:30 – and today you are eating at lunch at 11 in the morning…,” my boss remarked.

“Sir – I eat when I am hungry…” I retorted – but my stickler boss did not seem quite convinced.

Also – I sleep when I feel sleepy – not just because it is “bedtime”.

Well – I can go on and on till the cows come home – but I am sure you have got the gist of what I want to say.

Counting Kills Enjoyment

So – Dear Reader:

Stop Counting.

Stop Measuring.

Stop Clock-Watching.

Precision destroys Pleasure.

Counting Kills Enjoyment.

So why not live a more “Qualitative Life” – rather than the “Quantitative Life” you are living now…? 

PS: Whenever I head for a party – especially a get-together of ex-Navy Buddies – I do not take my watch and I switch off my mobile phone.

I am not going to count anything – no counting drinks – no counting calories – no clock-watching – just unrestrained “qualitative” enjoyment – yes – “Qualitative Enjoyment” – that is the way to have a jolly good time…

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All Stories in this Blog are awork of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve:
http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/qualitative-living.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This is a re-post of my self-help article COUNTING KILLS ENJOYMENT posted by me online earlier at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/04/counting-kills-enjoyment-self-help.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/03/precision-destroys-pleasure-counting.html

Lessons from Military Humor – Art of Officership

January 10, 2017

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/military-officership-story.html

Yesterday – there was a news item about a video of a BSF Jawan complaining about the quality of food served at an outpost went viral on the social media.

However – Politicians and Senior Officers sitting in Delhi responded with the usual cliched platitudes like “All is Well” “Morale is High” “Welfare is Top Priority” etc

The very fact that a soldier has to take recourse to the social media to air his grievances speaks volumes of the huge gap between the “Delhi-Centric” Senior Officers and the Troops in the field.

During my days in uniform – I observed that some “Delhi-Centric” Senior Officers had switched-off from “Soldiering” – they were behaving like “Babus in Uniform” and had no clue about the ground reality in the field/at sea.

Many such officers were in “Civilian” mode since they felt that they had earned their well-deserved R&R (9-to-5 five-day-week peace appointment) after many years of hardship in the field/at sea and they looked forward to a peaceful tenure and retirement ahead.

This news story reminded me of an article I had posted on my blog around 2 years ago in 2015.

Here is the article…

SPIT AND POLISH

An Apocryphal Story Re-told by VIKRAM KARVE

Sometime ago – I decided to clean my bookcase – and while delving through my collection of books – I saw a delightful book called  “The Psychology of Military Humour”  by Brigadier J. Nazareth which I had acquired long back.

While browsing through this book – I came across an anecdote about the celebrated Russian Second World War General Georgy Konstantinovich Zhukov (Marshal of the Soviet Union) (01 December 1896 – 18 June 1974).

Since the book mentioned the anecdote very briefly – I did a bit of searching on the internet – in order to enable me to narrate the story in a more elaborate manner.

Whether this “shoe-shining story” is true – or a part of folklore – we do not know.

What is important is the lesson to be learnt from the story.

SPIT AND POLISH

When he was handpicked to command the newly created mechanized regiment – the training principle that Zhukov introduced was:

If you do not know how to do it – we will teach you how to do it

If you do not want to do it – we will make you do it

Once – when he was the Regimental Commander – Zhukov decided to carry out a surprise inspection of the soldiers who were on duty.

He was accompanied by the Adjutant (a Major)

Zhukov was satisfied with the appearance and ‘turn-out’ of the soldiers – except one soldier – whose boots were poorly polished.

Zhukov asked the Adjutant what he thought of the soldier’s boots.

The Adjutant asked the soldier to explain why his boots were not polished properly.

The Soldier remained silent.

The Adjutant warned the soldier that he would be punished for improper turnout in uniform.

Zhukov interrupted the Adjutant – and – Zhukov said angrily to the Adjutant:

“I am asking you – not him. 

The important thing is not that the soldier’s boots are not polished properly.

What is more important is why you did not pay attention to the matter. 

There is apparently no one else in this regiment except the Commander to help him clean his boots…”

Zhukov ordered the Adjutant to bring a stool and boot polishing equipment.

A Stool and Boot Polishing Material was promptly brought.

Zhukov told the soldier to put one foot on the stool and watch attentively.

Then – Zhukov began polishing the soldier’s boot – showing the soldier exactly how to polish boots.

After a few minutes – the boot was shining.

Zhukov then gave the brush to the soldier and told him to polish the other boot to the same level of shine.

When the soldier had done so – Zhukov nodded and walked away.

MORAL OF THE STORY

In the Military – there is no substitute for professionalism.

An officer is supposed to know how to do a task – before he orders his subordinates to do it.

That is why military training is so elaborate with a “hands on” approach.

However – this is not so in the civil services – where “generalists” rule the roost – and – these clueless “administrators” sometimes pass vague and impracticable orders to specialists.

With the advent of “high-tech” weapons and modern military technology – this attitude seems to be creeping in the Defence Services too – and – I have seen occasions – when a “generalist” senior officer tries to “bullshit” a technical specialist – and ends up embarrassed when his ignorance is exposed.

Of course – “Bullshit” does not work any longer.

If an officer does not know how to do a task – how can he teach or supervise his subordinates to do that task…?

In today’s world – the earlier “Carry on Chief” Style Navy Officership does not work nowadays.

An Officer must be able to demonstrate to his juniors how to do a task.

That is why an Officer cannot stop learning even if he achieves high rank – because there is no substitute for continual learning and professionalism.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This article is a spoof, satire, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/military-officership-story.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Revised Re-Post of my article SPIT AND POLISH posted online earlier on 04 June 2015 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/06/humor-in-uniform-spit-and-polish.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/06/humor-in-uniform-spit-and-polish-shoe.html

Does Love Make You Happy…?

January 10, 2017

The Story of My Love Life – Dating Romance Marriage Affairs

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/the-story-of-my-love-life-dating.html

Does Love Make You Happy…?

I read somewhere that we humans have two basic desires: FOOD and LOVE

Some may contemplate a rather sensual connotation for “LOVE”

But – I prefer the romantic aspect.

So – for me – Love means Romance

I was quite lucky on the “FOOD” front.

Yes – I was highly successful in satisfying my Food Desires – which is evident from my “Foodie” Writings – in which I have described my Foodie Adventures.

However – was I successful as far as “LOVE” was concerned…?

Well – let me tell you about My Love Life in a Nutshell…

MY LOVE LIFE – IN A NUTSHELL

Dating Romance Marriage Affairs

A Spoof By Vikram Karve 

A GIRL IN EVERY PORT

“I have heard that Naval Officers have a girl in every port – but – so far – we don’t have even one single girl in even one port…” my course-mate said.

“Come on – we were under training. Maybe now – things will look up…” I said.

“Yes – I am sure we are going to have a good love life now…” my course-mate said, “we are lucky to have got Bombay based ships.”

(This story happened more than 39 years ago – in the 1970’s – and those days – Mumbai was called Bombay – but I shall use Mumbai from now on).

“Yes – we are indeed lucky as compared to those poor Vizag guys – they are destined to a desolate life,” I said.

TALENT FOR ROMANCE

“The first thing I am going to do in Mumbai is to get myself a girlfriend…” my friend said.

“Me too…” I said.

My friend succeeded.

I miserably failed.

I just did not have the talent for romance.

Everything had been handed down to me on a platter.

All the conditions to get a girlfriend were ideal.

I was located in ‘maximum city’ Bombay (now called Mumbai) – and – that too – South Bombay (SoBo) – which had plenty of the best most beautiful, chic and savvy modern girls wanting to be friends with young smart boys like me.

I was on the best ship of the fleet.

And – in those ‘licence-quota-permit Raj’ days – as far as girls were concerned – Navy Officers were in high demand – since we got exotic foreign stuff duty free (especially perfumes) – and these imported goodies were was not available outside – and we had access to the best of clubs and social circles.

(Now – with the advent of liberalization and globalization – the charm of the Defence Services has gone down – since everything we got ‘duty free’ – and much more – all these goodies are freely available to the ‘Civilian Elite’ who are much more debonair and affluent than the Naval Officers of today).

But going back to those ‘good old days’ of the 1970’s – most young Naval Officers had girlfriends – and a few ‘Casanovas’ were having a good time with ‘fleet auxiliaries’.

But – I had drawn a blank.

My coursemate had acquired a ‘girlfriend’ within a few days of our reaching Mumbai – and he was often seen gallivanting with her all over the place.

In my case – I had miserably failed to acquire a girlfriend.

So – instead of wasting my time on trying to romance girls – I focused on food and drink.

DO GIRLFRIENDS MAKE YOU HAPPY…?

Once – after imbibing half a bottle of whisky – followed by a sumptuous Biryani at Olympia on Colaba Causeway – and a delicious ‘Triple Sundae’ ice cream at Yankee Doodle on Marine Drive – I returned to my ship in a happy mood.

Soon – I was fast asleep – enjoying sweet ‘foodie dreams’ in my cabin.

Suddenly – I was rudely jolted awake.

It was my coursemate – who had come over from his ship – which was tied up alongside next to my ship.

“I am very upset – I want to talk to someone – and you are my best friend,” he said.

“Yes – once upon a time I was your ‘best friend’ – but now – you have got your darling girlfriend who you call ‘Honey’…” I said angrily.

“It’s about her – I just saw her off at the airport – she is on a long haul flight plan – she will be away for two weeks…” he said.

His girlfriend was an Air-Hostess who flew on international routes.

“Okay – so you can join me for food and drink till she comes back…” I said.

“No – it’s not that – she wants to marry me …” he said.

“So – get married,” I said.

“It is not so simple – my parents won’t agree – her parents want her to continue he job too – and in her airline – an ‘air-hostess’ has to quit the moment she gets married. It is all very complicated – I have realized that falling in love has complicated my life…” he said sadly.

And then – he went on and on…

He told me his entire ‘sob story’…

My lovesick friend totally disturbed my sleep – by narrating his ‘love woes’ till early morning.

I thought that having a girlfriend made you happier.

But – exactly the opposite had happened to my otherwise cheerful friend.

He appeared to have become miserable after falling in love.

I said to myself: “If having just one girlfriend had done this to him – just imagine the situation of those Casanovas with multiple girlfriends…!”

It seemed that a ‘zero-girlfriend’ guy like me was much happier than my counterparts who had girlfriends.

FOOD = FIXED DEPOSIT

I realized that – ‘Food’ was a Safe Investment like a Fixed Deposit.

Yes – focusing your energies on eating good food was like buying a Fixed Deposit in a Nationalized Bank.

It was a stable situation.

Maybe – the ‘returns’ were lower – but for the time and money you spent on food – you got a guaranteed ‘Return on Investment’ (ROI).

Yes – ‘investing’ in Food gave you a guaranteed ‘Return’ – maybe not a very high ‘Return on Investment’ (ROI) – but a safe steady predictable ‘Return on Investment’ (ROI) – just like Bank Fixed Deposits.

ROMANCE = STOCK MARKET

On the other hand – ‘Romance’ was a Risky Investment like the Stock Market.

Acquiring a girlfriend was like trading in a volatile share.

Romance is an emotionally volatile relationship – similar to a financially volatile stock market.

It was just like the ‘returns’ from the stock market which were fluctuating and unpredictable – and could vary from high to low – with dynamic changes every moment.

Yes – the ‘Return on Investment’ (ROI) that you got from a Romantic Relationship could swing between Agony and Ecstasy

A ‘ZERO-ROMANCE’ LOVELESS BACHELOR LIFE

So – being ‘risk-averse’ – I was content to spend my ‘zero-romance’ loveless bachelor life enjoying good food and drink.

Of course – I did make plenty of effort to ‘fall in love’ with many girls.

But – sadly – No girl was willing to fall in love with me.

My few attempts at dating girls ended in disaster.

So – I resigned myself to the fact that ‘love marriage’ was not in my destiny.

And – hence – I settled for an ‘arranged marriage’.

EXTRA MARITAL ROMANCE

As a newly married couple – my wife and I – along with our pet Lhasa Apso girl Sherry – the three of us – we lived in a lovely one room flat in Curzon Road Apartments in New Delhi.

One evening – we were sitting in Nathu’s Sweets – in Bengali Market – one of our favourite places – where we often walked down in the evenings.

There was a group of beautiful girls sitting nearby – and my eyes were focused on them.

Yes – I was ogling at the pretty girls – as most young men do – or want to do.

One girl seemed particularly attractive – and I was staring at her quite blatantly – with frank admiration in my eyes.

My wife followed my gaze.

She was quite amused to see me looking at the pretty girls so intently – especially the yearning look I gave to that most gorgeous girl who seemed to be the object of my total attention.

Suddenly – my gaze shifted.

My wife was curious.

Was there a new ‘object’ which had captured my attention?

She followed my gaze – to see where I was looking.

On observing the new ‘object of my attention’ – my wife started laughing.

A tray of sweets was being brought in from the kitchen – and my eyes had ‘locked on’ to the mouthwatering sweets like a Radar ‘locks on’ to its target.

The tray was heaped with my favourite sweet – the inimitable ‘Lavang Lata’.

Soon – I was fully focused on eating my Lavang Lata – totally oblivious to my surroundings.

And – I seemed to have completely forgotten about those beautiful girls sitting on the table nearby.

In fact – I was so absorbed in savouring the delicious ‘Lavang Lata’ – and I was enjoying myself so totally – that I even forgot about my wife sitting opposite – who was not quite relishing the dish of ‘Lavang Lata’ that I had ordered for her too.

“So – it seems that you found the ‘Lavang Lata’ more enticing than those beautiful girls…” my wife said to me.

“Of course – I love good food – there is no greater love than the love of food…” I said.

And then – while walking back home – I told her about my failed attempts to romance during my Mumbai days.

I explained to her why I preferred food to romance – about my theory:

“Food is like a Fixed Deposit versus “Romance is like the Stock Market”

My wife looked at me and said:

“Someone had told me that a Naval Officer has a girl in every port – but looking at you – I am convinced that you did not have even a single girl in any port – in fact – you must have had a ‘foodie joint’ in every port…”

EPILOGUE 

My wife was right – I did not have even a single girlfriend during my bachelor days.

But – after I got married – my luck improved – and – girls wanted to be friends with me – and – slowly but surely – I started having girlfriends – and – today – I have plenty of girlfriends – a few ‘real’ – and – most ‘virtual’ – especially after the advent of internet – most of my girlfriends are in the online ‘virtual’ world of cyberspace.

It is funny – isn’t it…?

Not a single girl wanted to be my friend before marriage (when I was a most ‘eligible’ bachelor)

And then – when I was ‘much married’ – and – no longer ‘eligible’ – so many beautiful “girls” wanted to be friends with me.

Can someone please explain this paradox.

But – let me tell you the one important precaution I take when making friends with girls – I get my girlfriends “approved” by my “Better Half”.

Yes – all my real life “offline girlfriends” have been duly “Approved” by my “Better Half”.

And – as far as my “online girlfriends” are concerned – I know that my virtual interactions with them are being rigorously monitored by my “Better Half”.

Ha Ha – so I can say that all my girlfriends are “approved girlfriends”.

Yes – if you are a married man – it is always better to get your girlfriends approved by your “Better Half” – it is safer that way – you have a clear conscience – and – you can have a transparent friendship – without the fear of being “found out”.

I am sure it is the same with married women too – isn’t it better to get your husband’s approval before having a “Boyfriend”…?

By the way – my “Better Half” approved of all my “girlfriends” – except one.

Ha Ha – about her – I will tell you next time.

Till then – have fun – and do tell me if you liked the story of my “Love Life”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/the-story-of-my-love-life-dating.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

This is a revised version of my story A GIRL IN EVERY PORT posted online by me Vikram Karve earlier in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal blog on 13 May 2015 at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/05/humor-in-uniform-girl-in-every-port.html  and reposted by me later at url:  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/09/my-love-life-dating-romance-marriage.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/04/my-love-life-in-nutshell-dating-romance.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/08/my-love-life-pre-marital-and-extra.html

Modern Parenting – Baby and Child Care Part 2 – Mr. and Mrs. X and their Baby

January 9, 2017

MODERN PARENTING and CHILDCARE

The Story of Mr. and Mrs. X and their Baby

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/baby-and-child-care-part-2-modern.html

Mr. and Mrs. X and their BABY – Fiction Short Story by Vikram Karve

Mr. and Mrs. X desperately wanted to have a baby.

So – Mr. and Mrs. X tried very hard to have a baby.

Poor Mr. and Mrs. X – they tried and tried – they put in a lot of effort – but they could not have a baby.

As time flew – and the biological clock ticked away – Mr. and Mrs. X became more and more anxious.

So with resolute perseverance – Mr. and Mrs. X put everything at stake to have a baby.

Mr. and Mrs. X made determined efforts to have a baby – they consulted the best doctors and fertility specialists in town – they spent huge amounts of money on the best and most sophisticated infertility treatments possible – they tried all sorts of things – exoteric and esoteric – they left no stone unturned – they struggled and struggled – with dogged persistence – till – at long last – at the age of 36 – Mrs. X conceived – and she got pregnant.

Then – after a difficult, delicate, gruelling, backbreaking, anxious, harrowing pregnancy – Mrs. X overcame all sorts of complications – and finally – after enduring for nine long months – Mrs. X successfully delivered a beautiful bonny baby.

Everyone was delighted.

The parents – Mr. and Mrs. X – were proud that they had proved their mettle.

The doctors boasted about the success of their treatment.

The grandparents were relieved that the family lineage was preserved.

The soothsayers, the relatives, the friends – everyone was happy that the much delayed and much awaited baby was born after so many trials and tribulations.

3 months after the baby was born – I happened to be in town.

I decided to visit Mr. and Mrs. X and their Baby.

On the way – at the jewellers – I bought a gold ornament as a present for the baby.

I found my way to their classy house in an elite residential society located in the most posh and exclusive neighbourhood of the city.

When I reached the deluxe apartment – I felt a tinge of envy – thinking about Mr. and Mrs. X  the young IT “Techie” whiz kids – who could afford such an expensive apartment – and an ostentatious living style – so early in life.

The proud grandparents opened the door.

The bonny baby – on her grandmother’s lap – looked very cute.

Yes – the baby was very cute and cuddly.

The baby’s parents – Mr. and Mrs. X – the young mother and father – were conspicuous by their absence.

It was late evening – and I had expected Mr. and Mrs. X to be at home – doting upon their adorable little baby.

In fact – the baby was so small – that I thought that Mrs. X would be still breastfeeding her baby.

I was curious why Mrs. X was not at home – so I asked the grandparents: “Where is the young mother…?”

“At work…” the grandfather answered.

“Oh. The young mother is already back at work…? The baby is only 3 months old and the mother has already started going to her office so fast…? Okay – no problem – it doesn’t matter – I want to meet her – I am in no hurry – so I will wait for her – she should be back home soon – isn’t it…?” I asked, looking at the wall clock.

“No! No! She won’t be coming for at least 6 months now…” the grandfather said.

“6 months…? Mrs. X won’t be coming for 6 months…?” I asked, confused.

“She has gone abroad – to America – on an important project…” said the proud grandmother, cuddling and mothering the baby.

“And what about Mr. X – the proud father of the baby – he should be coming back from work anytime now – isn’t it…?” I asked.

“He is in Singapore. He got a fantastic job offer on the same day the baby was born…” said the grandfather.

“What…?” I said.

“You know – the Baby has proved real lucky for her parents. The Baby’s mother got promoted as project leader with a hefty raise and was sent abroad to America for this prestigious overseas assignment – and – the Baby’s father got this fabulous job offer in Singapore…” said the proud grandmother, cuddling the baby.

The Baby suddenly started to cry.

“It is the baby’s feed-time…” the grandmother said.

The grandmother handed over the baby to the grandfather – and she went into the kitchen to warm up the baby’s milk.

“It’s good. I feel happy for my son and daughter-in-law…” the grandfather said – lovingly fondling the bonny baby, for all these years when they were trying so hard to have this baby – they had put their careers on the back-burner. Now that they have got their baby – they can focus on their careers once again…”

The grandmother came out with the milk bottle – and she began feeding the bonny baby – while the doting grandfather lovingly looked on.

I looked at the grandparents – the “surrogate” parents – the glorified “nannies”.

Then – I looked at the Baby.

Mr. and Mrs. X had indeed “produced” the Baby.

But – it was the delighted grandparents who would enjoy the joys of parenting the baby.

In fact – now – for the old couple – it was the Baby who was their “light of life” – their raison d’etre  their very reason for living – and certainly the source of all their present happiness.

And – the parents of the Baby – Mr. and Mrs. X – both are busy in the pursuit of their careers – the mother in America – and – the father in Singapore.

Mr. and Mrs. X do not know what they are missing by “outsourcing” their parenting and child-care duties.

Also – I do not understand one thing.

The “Moot Question”:

If Mr. and Mrs. X did not want to look after their own Baby – why did they make so much effort to produce the Baby…?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/baby-and-child-care-part-2-modern.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

I wrote this story Mr. and Mrs. X and the BABY nearly 10 years ago in the year 2007 and I have earlier posted it online in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal and My Various Creative Writing Blogs a number of times including at urls: http://creative.sulekha.com/mr-and-mrs-x-and-the-baby_491037_blog  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2010/10/surrogate-parenting.html  and http://creative.sulekha.com/career-marriage-parenting_469617_blog and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/05/blog-fiction-story-no-39-mr-and-mrs-x.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/03/modern-parenting-mr-and-mrs-x-and-baby.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/03/modern-parenting-mr-and-mrs-x-and-baby.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/08/parenting-la-mode-mr-and-mrs-x-and-baby.html  and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/07/modern-parenting-and-child-care-mr-and.html  etc

Modern Parenting – Baby and Child Care Part 1 – The “Ayah”

January 9, 2017

BABY AND CHILD CARE 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/baby-and-child-care.html

The “Ayah” – A Story By Vikram Karve

This happened almost 32 years ago – in mid-1985.

I was newly posted as an Instructor (“Directing Staff” – in “Pongo” jargon) at IAT Girinagar Pune – which – in those days – was the premier inter-service technology training institution.

On my very first evening – I set off on a long walk in the beautiful verdant campus nestled in the hills.

On the way – I noticed a pram (perambulator) – with a baby inside.

The baby was around one year old.

The baby was sitting inside the pram.

The pram was unattended.

It was the height of summer – and – the hot sun was shining brightly – directly on the baby.

Yes – the baby’s face was exposed to the bright sun.

The baby’s face had become red – and – the baby’s eyes were cringed with irritation.

The baby was crying due to discomfort.

I moved the pram into the shade and looked around.

I saw a group of maids chatting nearby.

I called out to them.

A woman came running – it was obvious the she was the “ayah” responsible for looking after the baby.

I admonished the maid for leaving the baby unattended in the hot sun.

Well – “admonish” may be a mild word – I shouted at the maid and gave her a severe scolding for neglecting her duties and leaving the baby all alone in the hot sun.

I told the maid to take the baby home – and I waited – till the maid walked away with the pram.

Thereafter – I proceeded on a long evening walk.

On the way back – I stopped off the Officers’ Mess Library to browse magazines – then – I had a couple of drinks in the Bar.

I returned home in “high spirits” at around 8 PM.

The door was open.

I walked in.

I saw a beautiful woman sitting inside holding a baby in her arms.

I recognized the baby.

So – this was the mother of the baby who I had rescued from the hot sun.

I thought the lady had come to thank me for my good deed.

But – that lady had not come to thank me.

She was annoyed with me and she had come to caution me.

“Why did you shout at my maid…?” the lady asked me angrily.

“Your “ayah” had left the baby all alone in the hot sun…” I said.

“There was no need to shout at my maid…”

“But – your baby was crying – your baby was feeling uncomfortable in the hot sun – and your maid was chatting away…”

“That’s none of your business – it is my baby and I will see what to do. Do you know – all because of you – my maid so upset that she is threatening to leave…?”

“You should sack her for being negligent in her duties and not looking after your baby properly…”

“You want me to sack my maid…? And what should I do…? Should I quit my job and sit at home all day to look after my child…?”

I was about to say “Yes” – when my wife came out of the kitchen carrying a tray with two cups of coffee.

My wife motioned me to remain silent.

The lady kept her baby on the sofa beside her – and she said to my wife: “Please tell your husband not to shout at my maid again. I have a full-time job – I leave my house at 9 in the morning and come back after 6 in the evening – I am totally dependent on my maid for looking after my baby – so – if my maid quits – I will be in a big problem – I am sure you know how difficult it is to get a full-time maid…”

I wanted to tell the lady – “Why don’t you quit your job and look after your baby yourself”

But – it seemed that my wife had guessed what I wanted to say – so – my wife was signaling to me to keep my mouth shut.

My wife said to the lady: “I am sorry for the trouble – in future – my husband will mind his own business…”

I went inside.

When I came out – the lady with the baby had left.

“She is a funny woman – her maid was neglecting the baby and had kept the pram in the hot sun – I did a good deed by scolding the maid – and – instead of thanking me – the baby’s mother is annoyed with me…” I said to my wife.

“Try to understand – she is a “career woman” – she has to work full-time all-day at the office – so – she needs someone to look after her baby…” my wife said.

“Why do women have babies if they don’t want to look after them…?”

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

This story is a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2017/01/baby-and-child-care.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

 

My New Year’s Resolution for 2017 – I Will Flower and Bloom Wherever God Plants Me

December 31, 2016

New Year’s Resolution 2017

You must know how to Flower where God has Sown You 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/new-years-resolution-2017-i-will-flower.html

Inspirational Pep Talk By VIKRAM KARVE

I learnt more about the Art of Living by reading good literature – rather than from hearing sermons and moral lectures – or from high-falutin philosophy or spiritualism.

One thing good about the Navy is that it inculcated and fostered the reading habit in me.

I read a lot of sea stories and novels like The Cruel SeaThe Caine MutinyRun Silent Run DeepHMS UlyssesTales of the South Pacific  and so many more.

One sea novel I like very much is THE CAPTAIN by Jan De Hartog

In this story – the protagonist is a Merchant Navy Officer who is frustrated because – owing to reasons beyond his control – he gets stuck in Tugs whereas he wants to sail in the main fleet.

Seeing his frustration – his Tug Captain gives him a maxim:

“ Ou Dieu vous a seme  il faut savoir fleurir ”

which roughly translated means

“ You must know how to flower where God has sown you ” 

or

“ wherever God plants you – there you must learn how to bloom ”

The young Merchant Navy Officer takes this to heart – he works very hard on the Tug – and then – he works with dedication, sincerity and devotion to duty throughout his career on Tugs.

In due course – he becomes the most famous sea-going Tug Captain – and ultimately the owner of flourishing company with a huge fleet of ocean going tugs.

Inspired by this book – I too tried my best to imbibe this philosophy in my life – especially in my Naval Career – and – I tried my best to “flower” wherever the Navy posted me.

It is good philosophy to apply in your life:

“Wherever God plants you  there you must learn how to flower and bloom…”

LIKE IT OR LUMP IT

If you do not get what you like – then – you must learn to like what you get – and – you must make the most of it 

Like they say in the Navy:

If you don’t like it – just lump it.

“Like it or “Lump it

There is another saying I read a few years ago:

If life gives you a lemon  make lemonade.

Yes – when life gives you a “lemon” – use that “lemon” and make “lemonade” – instead of cribbing and carping – wallowing in self pity – becoming bitter and spreading bitterness – and making your own life hell and everyone else’s life miserable.

Like they say in NLP :

There is no such thing as “failure” 

There is only “learning experience”

So – metaphorically – the “lemon” is the failure – and – the “lemonade” is the learning experience.

And this “learning experience” will enable you to “flower” and “bloom” wherever you are “sown” or “planted”

Well – I have tried to follow this mantra: “ Ou Dieu vous a seme  il faut savoir fleurir ”

When I was in the Navy – wherever the Navy transferred me – to whatever job they assigned me – whether they promoted me or not – I tried not to get disillusioned or demoralized – and in my own inimitable style – I tried to do my best to “flower” and “bloom” wherever I was “sown” or “planted”.

Yes – I made “lemonade” with all the “lemons” the Navy gave me.

I am trying to do this after my retirement too – trying to “flower” and “bloom” in the back-of-beyond lonely place called Wakad, near Pune – where God has planted me after my retirement.

That is one of the reasons you are reading this Blog.

Yes – the result of all this “flowering” and “blooming” is this prolific Blog and the couple of books I have written.

Well – I am going to “flower” and “bloom” away and “bash on regardless” with my Blogging and Writing – since this is the best thing I can do where God has planted me.

God has given me the “lemon” of loneliness.

And – from this “lemon” of loneliness – I have made the “lemonade” of my blogs and my books and all my writing.

Have a good day – whatever “lemons” you get today – just keep making “lemonade” and enjoy every drop of it.

Sometimes you may feel a sense of “failure” – you may feel that you have “failed” in life.

There is no such thing as “failure” – it is all in the mind.

And still if you feel a sense of “failure” – think of “failure” as a “lemon” – and make “lemonade”.

Talking of the “lemon” of “failure” – let me tell you one thing I have learnt from my own life experiences.

Sometimes – failure is good

You can take my word for it.

Remember the maxim:

“ Ou Dieu vous a seme  il faut savoir fleurir ”  

(wherever God plants you – there you must learn how to flower and bloom)

Apply this to your life – and you will “flower and bloom” wherever you are.

Dear Reader:

Wish you a Very Happy New Year 2017

May you “flower and bloom” wherever God has planted you.

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

  1. These are my personal views.Please do your own due diligence while selecting a philosophy of life.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/new-years-resolution-2017-i-will-flower.html

This article is an abridged version of my article posted online at urls: http://creative.sulekha.com/ou-dieu-vous-a-seme-il-faut-savoir-fleurir_469567_blog  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2010/10/ou-dieu-vous-seme-il-faut-savoir.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2013/10/learning-art-of-living-from-literature.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2015/11/navy-philosophy-like-it-or-lump-it.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/10/insipirational-self-help-mantra.html etc

My New Year’s Resolution 2017 – “To Do” or “Not To Do” – “To Meet” or “Not To Meet”

December 30, 2016

New Year’s Resolution 2017

“Not To Do” and “Not To Meet” Life Management Strategy 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/new-years-resolution-2017-not-to-do-and.html

My New Year’s Resolution 2017 is to Make “Not To Do” and “Not To Meet” Lists and Follow Them to the extent feasible.

Here is how I am going to do it.

Why don’t you try it out too…?

“TO DO” or “NOT TO DO”  –  “TO MEET” or “NOT TO MEET”

My New Year’s Resolution 2017 By VIKRAM KARVE 

“TO DO” LIST  

When I was in the Navy – I always had a “to do” list or a “slop chit” (in Naval parlance).

It was standard Naval Practice for Navy officers to carry a “slop chit” in their pocket at all times – especially in work-intensive appointments like those on board Warships and in Naval Dockyards.

At the start of the day – we wrote down all the jobs to be done on the “slop chit”.

When a task was completed – we struck off that entry – and whenever there was a new job to be done – we added that job to the “slop chit”.

The tasks which remained incomplete at the end of the day – we transferred to the next day’s page.

I am sure you maintain such “to do” lists too – nowadays you can maintain these “slop chits” in digital form on your mobile cellphone, smartphone, ipad, tablet – or on your laptop too.

At work – these “to do” lists are obligations you have to perform in return for the money your employer pays you as salary.

Sometimes, the “obligations” can be non-monetary too – like marital obligations towards your spouse – or familial obligations towards your family, children, parents or relatives – or a commitment you have made to someone.

In short – “to do” lists are related to “obligations”.

“NOT TO DO” LIST

Now that I have retired – I have a “not to do” list.

Now – for a Veteran like me – there is no need for a “to do” list as far as “work” is concerned.

Once you retire – you don’t work for anyone – you do not have an employer who pays you money – so you have no obligations as far as “work” is concerned.

There is no “job” for you to do – and hence – there is no need to maintain a “slop chit” or “to do” list as far as “work” is concerned.

In most cases – by the time you retire – your children have “flown away” from your nest – so you do not have any parenting responsibilities either.

Yes – even after retirement – you may have some “bare minimum inescapable obligations – like essential daily chores, paying bills etc.

In India – even after retirement – they hassle you with sundry issues.

For example – all pensioners have to visit their banks in November every year to render a “life certificate” in person in order to prove that they are alive.

Various types of bills and taxes are to be paid, returns are to be filed, banking work has to be done – but you can reduce these to the bare minimum inescapable requirements.

You must try to delegate these tasks to someone else.

Or you can use information technology to do these tasks online with minimal effort.

To put it in a nutshell – once you retire – your aim should be to minimize these sundry tasks to bare minimum.

Now – once you have reduced these so-called “inescapable” tasks to the bare minimum – almost zero – then you will find there is no need to maintain a daily “slop chit” or a “to do list” for these very few “inescapable” tasks.

However – in order to enjoy bliss – you must make sure you do not get tied down in unnecessary “obligations” which will eat into your time (like Parkinson’s Law).

In fact – after retirement – what you must do every day – is to maintain a daily “not to do” list.

Yes – you must maintain a “not to do” list.

“TO DO” or “NOT TO DO” – The Secret of Blissful Retirement

After retirement – you are supposed to enjoy a peaceful and blissful retired life “doing nothing”.

Every person has a different concept of how to enjoy “blissful retirement”.

I like to spend my time reading, writing, blogging, social networking, watching TV and taking long walks – especially food-walks.

Some of my ex “fauji” friends like to play golf every morning followed by chilled beer with their Navy buddies talking of the “good old days”.

There is a crazy guy who is enjoying his retired life indulging in adventure sports – despite his age.

Some like to spend their time indulging in spiritual activities.

Others travel – many take up a hobby – and some involve themselves in social activities.

Everyone has different ideas of “Bliss” – “to each his own bliss – as they say.

I know what “blissful retirement” means for me.

You know what “blissful retirement” means for you.

Every individual knows his or her idea of “Bliss”.

So – after retirement – “blissful retirement” will be the only item on your daily “slop chit” or “to do” list.

Yes – after retirement  ideally  there will be just one item on your “to do” list – to enjoy BLISSFUL RETIREMENT.

Thus – there is no need for you to maintain an exhaustive “to do” list.

Now – you have only one “to do” item in your life – to enjoy blissful retirement.

“NOT TO DO” LIST

In order to enjoy retirement – what you must maintain is a “not to do” list.

Your “not to do” list will include all those activities which impede or interfere with the enjoyment of “blissful retirement”.

Whatever hassles you – those burdensome but unnecessary obligations and activities which waste your time and cause you stress – just put them on your “not to do” list.

I have realized that – after retirement – what you decide “not to do” is more important than what you decide “to do”.

The “not to do” list need not be not restricted to activities alone.

You must have a “not to do” list for people too

Maybe v you can call it a “not to meet” list.

Yes – your “not to do” list must include a “not to meet” list as well.

“NOT TO MEET” LIST

Let me give you a simple example of a “not to meet” situation from my life.

Long back – in the Navy – I once had a “toxic” boss who I did not like.

This boss hassled me – and he induced stress in me.

Our “vibes” just did not match.

Even being in his company was stressful for me.

Now – this boss had decreed that he would have a meeting at 9 AM every morning.

He wanted everyone – including me – to be present.

Since I was working in the Navy – I had no choice but to put the 9 AM meeting on the “to do” list – though I would rather have this painful morning meeting with the boss on my “not to do” list.

In the morning – this boss would ask us about our work – and then micromanage – ordering us to report on progress from time to time – and though I hated it – I had to put all this on my “to do” list – the progress reports which entailed meeting or speaking to the boss – which I hated to do.

So – after meeting the bare minimum inescapable requirement of the morning meeting – I put my boss (and other “toxic” types) on my “not to meet” list – and – I adopted a series of “evasive measures” to discourage the boss from meeting me.

After some time – the boss got the message and he stopped trying to micromanage me or monitor me – he would never call me – unless there was a real emergency.

It is best to put people who hassle you on your “not to meet” list.

Now – I have retired – I am my own boss – and I am a free bird.

There is no obligation for me to meet anybody.

I can decide who I want to meet – and who I do not want to meet.

So now I have a “not to meet” list of toxic people I do not wish to meet.

MAKE TWO LISTS  – “NOT TO DO” LIST and “NOT TO MEET” LIST

Yes – you must make two lists:

  1. What you do not want to do –you must put on your “not to do” list.
  1. The persons whom you do not want to meet –you must put onyour “not to meet” list.

FREE CHOICE – “TO DO” or “NOT TO DO” 

Similarly – just before retirement – I was a Professor – and my “to do” list comprised the lecture assignments and guidance of research work which were an “obligation” – since I was paid a salary.

Now – after retirement – I am often invited to deliver guest lectures and conduct training programs – but since I am under no obligation – I am free to decide whether “to do” or “not to do”.

And – if I decide “to do” – then I do so on my own terms.

WHY WAIT FOR RETIREMENT…?

WHY NOT HAVE “NOT TO DO” and “NOT TO MEET” LISTS RIGHT NOW

I will let you in on a secret.

I had started practicing this “not to do” and “not to meet” strategy long back in the early stages of my career – albeit covertly and tactfully.

How did I manage “not to do” and “not to meet” lists during my career…?

Those tricks I will tell you some other time – but I am sure you can use your ingenuity to devise your own techniques.

For example – in order to make your “not to do” and “not to meet” strategy succeed – you may have to project an “abrasive personality” – and – you may have to practice “creative incompetence”.

As you grow wiser with experience – you will realise that the “not to do” and “not to meet” lists are closely intertwined.

So – you need not wait for retirement to make your first “not to do” and “not to meet” lists.

You can do it right now.

During your career you will have to be a bit canny while practising this – I could do it in the Navy.

Of course – once you retire you can do it brazenly.

So – Dear Reader – why don’t you start right now…?

Every morning – instead of a “to do” list – you must make a “not to do” list.

Of course – like I said earlier – the “not to do” list must include “not to meet” list as well.

Decide what “NOT TO DO” rather than what “TO DO”.

Decide who “NOT TO MEET” rather than who “TO MEET” 

Implement this daily “life management strategy” – and you will see your efficiency rise – your mood become better – and – your stress will disappear.

As I said earlier – you will realize that – deciding what “not to do” may be more beneficial rather than deciding what “to do”.

Dear Reader: Why don’t you try this out in the New Year 2017 – why don’t you make this your New Year’s Resolution…?

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve
1. If you share this post, please give due credit to the author Vikram Karve
2. Please DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. Please DO NOT Cut/Copy/Paste this post
© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:

All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/12/new-years-resolution-2017-not-to-do-and.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved. 

This is an Abridged Version of My Article Earlier Posted Online by me Vikram Karve more than 2 years ago in the year 2014 at 3/28/2014 09:30:00 PM in my Academic and Creative Writing Journal Blog at url: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/03/to-do-or-not-to-do-key-to-life.html and http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2014/12/not-to-do-and-not-to-meet-lists-to-do.html  and  http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2016/06/to-do-or-not-to-do-to-meet-or-not-to.html etc

 

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