“Kiwi-Indian” Tales – A “Happy Ending”


Adult Fiction – A Spoof By Vikram Karve 


“Did you enjoy the massage…?” he asked me.

“No…” I said.

“No…? What happened…? I thought you would enjoy the massage…”

“The masseur got too personal…”

Masseur…? How is that possible…? You had a man give you the massage…?”

“No. No. It was a woman – a girl…”

“Ah. Then the right word is masseuse”…”


“Yes – “masseuse” is the feminine of “masseur”…”


“Anyway – what happened…? Why didn’t you enjoy the massage…? Didn’t you feel happy and relaxed after the massage…?”

“No – I felt embarrassed and uncomfortable …”

“You felt uncomfortable…?  Why…?”

“The masseur – I mean the masseuse – she got too close for comfort…”

“What do you mean “too close for comfort”…?”

“She got too intimate…?”


“She was trying to touch me inappropriately at all sorts of places – even my private parts…”

“So what’s wrong…? She was supposed to do that…”

“I thought it will be a “clean” massage…”

“Ha. Ha. “Clean” Massage…!!! This was supposed to be a “sensual” massage – not physiotherapy…!!!”

“Sensual Massage…?”

“Yes. Tell me – wasn’t it a stimulating experience…?”

“Stimulating…? Not at all. For me – it was an uncomfortable experience – I felt uneasy and awkward…”


“Sir – I told you – she got too close for comfort – first – she took off everything – then – she was rubbing against me all over…”

“Well – that’s what a sensual massage is all about…”

“Sir – you won’t believe what she did next…”

“What…? What did your masseuse do…?”

I told him about the disgusting thing she did.

He started laughing – and he said to me:

“So – she gave you a “happy ending”…?”

“Happy Ending…?” I asked, clueless.

“What she did to you is called “Happy Ending”. By the way – she was supposed to do that – to give you “happy ending” – I had paid for it. At least – I hope you enjoyed that part of the massage…!!!” he said.

“I am feeling very guilty…” I said.

“Guilty…? Why are you feeling guilty…?” he asked me.

“The girl – she was so young – she looked so innocent – and – she was doing all these indecent things…”

“That’s her job – as a masseuse…”

“I will never forget her face…”

“Come on. Don’t get sentimental. I hope you haven’t fallen in love with her or something…?”

“I think she was from India…”

“Really…? Well – out here – most of the masseuses are migrants – but a “Kiwi-Indian” masseuse – that’s quite rare…”

“She seemed to be from a good family. I don’t know why…”

“Hey – forget her now. Let’s have a quick beer at a good pub and get back to the ship…”

Next morning – we sailed out from Auckland – from our berth alongside Captain Cook Wharf – towards our next port of call – Osaka – in Japan.

“RoRo” Ships have their pros and cons – you visit the best ports – you are berthed at the most convenient wharfs – but – you stay in port for a very short time – just a day or two at the most.

At the end of the voyage – my sailing contract period was over – and I returned to India on two months leave.


One Month Later 

(At the home of a Lady) 

My Investment Advisor friend was taking me out for lunch.

On the way – he had to deliver some Mutual Fund Certificates to one of his clients – a lady.

The lady asked us to come inside – she was a beautiful middle-aged woman – 50 – maybe slightly older.

As my friend explained the documents to the lady – I looked around the room.

I saw a framed photo on the mantelpiece – and – I walked over to have a closer look.

I looked at the girl in the framed photo on the mantelpiece.

I recognized the girl at once.

It was the same girl I had met in Auckland – the masseuse who had given me the “happy ending”.

I picked up the photo-frame and looked at the girl in the photo.

Yes – no doubt about it – it was her – the same girl I had met in Auckland – the massage girl who had given me the “happy ending”.

I asked the Lady: “Who is this girl in the photo…?”

“That is my daughter…” the lady said, “she lives in New Zealand – in Auckland. She is doing really well – she already has a car – and she will be buying her own house soon…”

“Oh – that’s really good – what does she do…?” I asked the lady.

“She works in the “hospitality industry”…” the lady said.

Copyright © Vikram Karve
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© vikram karve., all rights reserved.


  1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.
  2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Copyright © Vikram Karve (All Rights Reserved)

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2018/05/happy-ending.html

© vikram karve., all rights reserved. 

Link to my original post in my Blog Academic and Creative Writing Journal Vikram Karve: http://karvediat.blogspot.in/2018/05/happy-ending.htmlA

This story is also posted in my Writing Blog at url: https://karve.wordpress.com/2018/05/25/the-masseuse-a-happy-ending-story/

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